Channing Tatum and Jenna Dewan call it quits – dlisted
Is Anna Wintour leaving Vogue? – Celebitchy
Kendra Wilkinson posts a video, cries as she talks about marriage issues – Starcasm
Brangelina are almost officially dunzo – dlisted
8 PM EST –
The Voice (NBC)
Little People, Big World (TLC) – special
America’s Next Top Model (VH1)
9 PM EST –
Real Housewives of Beverly Hills (Bravo)
Married at First Sight (Lifetime)
The Challenge (MTV)
Little People, Big World (TLC) – premiere
10 PM EST –
Summer House (Bravo) – reunion
Chopped (Food Network)
Love at First Flight (Lifetime)
My Little Life (TLC) – premiere
Photo Credit: Jason LaVeris/FilmMagic
The post Tuesday Night Tea – April 3rd appeared first on Reality Tea.
The Real Housewives reunion episodes are a treat for the viewers, but they are torturous for the cast and crew to film. It takes a lot of time and effort to prep those looks and many hours filming to rehash problems that they already moved past.
Recently Kyle Richards opened up about the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills reunion and how being a Real Housewife is just a lot more draining than she ever expected it to be.
In a new interview Kyle admitted, “When I first signed up to do the ‘Housewives,’ I thought, OK, I’m going to do this little show for two months and that’s it. Well, two months ended up being — shooting for four or five months, and then it ended up being a year-round job.” And she’s been on the show since the very beginning, which means Real Housewives has consumed 8+ years of her life.
Kyle continued, “When you’re not shooting, you’re still doing interviews, and then there’s reunion and then you’re doing press — it takes up a lot of your time.” But it’s definitely worth it. Since joining the show, Kyle wrote a book, opened up clothing stores, and created a scripted series. Plus the show has served as platform for her to promote The Agency with countless shirts, hats, and bumper stickers with the company’s logo.
As if the regular season wasn’t tough enough, Kyle shared her view on filming the reunion episodes: “Preparing for the reunion is like going into a boxing ring, I always say that. I mean literally it feels like that.”
She explained, “We all go to our rooms — they like to keep us separate because they don’t want any conversations to happen off camera because they want everything to happen on camera,” which makes sense. It just sounds like a lot. Kyle also shared the time line: “It’s a whole crazy process that lasts all day, and we wake up at like 5:30 in the morning, get picked up really early and then we’re done about 8 p.m. at night. It’s a long day of sitting and talking about torture.” I would feel bad for them if they weren’t gaining fame, money, and countless opportunities from the reality TV exposure.
RELATED: Erika Jayne “Feared Nothing” Going Into The RHOBH Reunion; Insists She’s Very Firm In Her Beliefs
Tonight is an all new episode of The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. “A peaceful horseback ride through the German countryside takes a dangerous turn for Kyle and Lisa Rinna. The ladies get emotional while visiting the Eisenman Holocaust Memorial and Berlin Wall. The group gets into the Oktoberfest spirit when they spend the night dancing at a Berlin beer hall.”
Join us in the comments at 9/8C and come back tomorrow for Mary’s recap!
TELL US- WHAT DO YOU WANT THE CAST TO DISCUSS DURING THE REAL HOUSEWIVES OF BEVERLY HILLS SEASON 8 REUNION? DO YOU THINK KYLE WILL HAVE A HARD TIME AT THE REUNION THIS SEASON?
[Photo Credit: Bravo]
The post Kyle Richards Compares Real Housewives Reunion To “Going Into A Boxing Ring” appeared first on Reality Tea.
Nothing will ever top the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills seasons with the original cast members. The show that originally blessed us with story lines about sibling relationships, addiction, domestic violence, adultery, and divorce is now subjecting us to a multiple-episode arc on being late to lunch and countless scenes with the Housewives packing and picking outfits.
OG cast member Adrienne Maloof opens up about the impact of the show on her marriage with now-ex-husband Paul Nassif, her current relationship status with Jacob Busch, and the possibility of returning to the 90210 as a full-time Housewife.
In an interview for the Juicy Scoop With Heather McDonald podcast, Adrienne admits, “For us, we went through the divorce. It would have happened regardless of the show or not. People always ask ‘Did the show cause your divorce?’ No, the show did not cause the divorce. It didn’t help, but it wasn’t the cause of it. We would have eventually ended that way, but I will say we both agreed to- for the sake of our children- lots of counseling, co-parenting, and I think we’re good role models for other people going through divorces.”
Heather McDonald discussed a party of Adrienne’s that she attended and remarked, “You had your boyfriend there. You guys are still together.” Adrienne corrected her and stated, “We’re really good friends.” So I guess she’s not officially dating Jacob Busch anymore?
Heather pointed out, “You just posted something.” Adrienne told her, “We were together on Valentine’s Day. We’re very, very, very, good friends. We’ll see what happens. Right now, I just kind of need to focus on some other things going on in my life, but yeah, good guy.” In case anyone was curious, this is the Instagram post that Heather was referring to.
Then, Heather got to the most important question of the interview: “Do you ever want to come back full-time?” Adrienne admitted, “I should never say ‘never,’ but I like kind of popping in and popping out. I do. I like it. Full-time is a full-time job and I’m raising three young boys. It gets a little difficult. Being a single mom, I think it’s hard too.” I don’t blame her. She already has more than enough money and the show really isn’t that good these days, so it’s not worth it. Why would she want to subject herself to arguments about glassware and remembering fun facts about Lisa Vanderpump?
The show just isn’t the same anymore. Adrienne said, “You can’t bottle what we had. The originals, the OGs, we brought the ratings in. For whatever reasons, it all worked.” Absolutely.
A lot has changed though. Aside from the show going down hill, Adrienne’s business empire has gone through it’s own transformation. After tons of promotion about her family’s involvement with Palms Casino Resort in Las Vegas during the show’s first three seasons, Adrienne shared, “We’ve moved on and we’re looking at other things in that genre.” Interesting. She also revealed, “We sold the basketball team and now we’re founding partners in the NHL. The Las Vegas Golden Nuggets have an amazing record.”
And what about that Maloof Hoof drama? Adrienne is done with the shoe endeavor and shared, “That was a licensing deal. I enjoyed that.” Same. Well, not the actual shoes, but the drama that the line brought to the show.
TELL US- DO YOU WANT ADRIENNE TO RETURN TO REAL HOUSEWIVES OF BEVERLY HILLS AS A FULL-TIME CAST MEMBER?
[Photo Credit: Bravo]
The post Adrienne Maloof Discusses Her Divorce, Current Relationship Status, & The Possibility Of Returning To Real Housewives Of Beverly Hills Full-Time appeared first on Reality Tea.
How do you follow up an acceptance video featuring one adorable puppy? You make an acceptance video featuring two adorable puppies! That's what The 100 star Bob Morley did to...We get our first baby of the season and here’s hoping that all the daddies can be as attentive and nurturing as Sean’s first night home with Jade and baby Kloie! If not, we have to hope that hard hitting relative like Aunt Vania will come in and set them straight! Let’s dive in to the latest episode of Teen Mom: Young and Pregnant!
Round 1
Jade: Jade and Sean got into a big fight but sit down to talk it out. I am actually buying that they are young and scared. Having your first baby is intimidating.
Lexi: Kyler on the other hand is not too stressed out about the fact that his first child could come any time. His mom is. And his little brother seems jazzed about being an uncle, but Kyler can’t really find the energy to do more than throw a ball around the park and eat. Lexi is setting up the crib. She is trying to negotiate Kyler’s visitation with her parents.
Ashley: After all of the effort last episode it seems no one is on the same page. Bar realizes that he may have told both his mom and Ashley what they wanted to hear, which means he made conflicting promises. Shen plans to force her way to the hospital to see her grand baby regardless of what anyone thinks. This has me wondering what any of them mean. Does Shen plan to visit after the baby is born? Or does she plan to be there for the actual labor and delivery? Also, in my experience hospitals and maternity wards have pretty strict security so you can limit visitors by just not giving them codes to come to that floor. I’m guessing those security measures were put in place because of people like Shen.
Brianna: Brianna and Danae are visiting his family in Chicago. We learn that Danae followed Brianna to Wisconsin. Danae seems really happy around his family. We also learn that the baby is being named Braeson, for the first two letters of Brianna’s name and the last two letters of Danae’s. It is different and creative. I hope that Brianna is serious about keeping Danae in Braeson’s life regardless of their relationship status.
Kayla: Are we shocked that Stephan is late for the baby shower? Also, when it comes to décor and baby shower prep let your mom do it. Stephan doesn’t strike me as being particularly in tune with design and baby themes. I really appreciated the juxtaposition of a slurry of f-bombs being dropped while the camera focused on an elderly woman with a walker.
Round 2
Lexi: Lexi and Kyler are cleaning up a changing table. They seem to start making progress with discussing plans for when the baby comes, only for Kyler to declare he doesn’t make plans so its all up to Lexi. He certainly is a charmer.
Jade: Jade has invited three people with her to what she hopes is her last doctor’s appointment. She and her mom get into a big fight just before the doctor walks in. He can clearly feel the awkward vibes and tension and Jade’s mom pleads for him to get the baby out.
Ashley: Ashley tells us that she and Bar got into a fight and were joined by her mom this time. We are then treated to a heated discussion between Ashley and Pastor Tea. Based on Momma Tea’s yelling I bet she makes a good pastor. She just has a nice voice even as she yells that she’ll “storm whenever she wants to” because this is “my house.”
Brianna: So both Danae and Brianna cheated on each other. Brianna feels more judged because she is carrying the evidence of her transgression by walking around pregnant.
Jade: We go back to Jade who is in labor and checked in to the hospital. At first Sean is on the computer but as labor progresses along with Jade’s pain he holds her hand and acts attentive. No one knows where Jade’s mom is. Hours later she shows up. Jade can finally start pushing and we get our first baby of Teen Mom: Young and Pregnant! At 7 pounds 7 ounces baby Kloie is here!
Round 3
Lexi: Kyler is playing catch with a friend and facing the fact that he is about to be a father. Lexi is terrified and focused on the plan for the first week. An outsider might wonder what week 2 will bring but perhaps these two do need to get through week one before they can get the strength to think beyond that.
Kayla: Kayla is upset with Stephan but trying to put on a brave face. Even Stephan’s family has written him off as his aunt Vania says “We don’t care anything about that we are here for the baby.” Aunt Vania gives Stephan an earful as she leaves. She has high standards and lets Stephan know she expects him to step up. All of these daddies could use an Aunt Vania (can we get her to make a trip to Colorado to talk to Kyler).
Ashley: Bar is talking to his mom on the phone. We sure get a lot of scenes with Shen on the iphone. Shen apparently has some health concerns and can’t get the doctor’s clearance to come see the baby in the hospital. Bar seems incredibly relieved (this seems to be a divine miracle so maybe Pastor Tea was praying overtime). Ashley and her mom work things out as her sister oversees the conversation.
Brianna: Brianna calls her mom after her fight with Danae. She then talks to Robin. Danae gets upset that his mom sticks up for Brianna. I think the larger issue is that Danae feels alone in Wisconsin because Brianna’s mom is always picking and doesn’t ever see things from his side. Robin seems incredibly level headed, I just wish she were closer to these two on a daily basis.
Round 4
Kayla: Kayla retrieves an upset Stephan from the bathroom. He may be struggling quite a bit with these changes. Kayla starts to feel for him despite having been angry that morning. While she doesn’t want to completely let go of her annoyance with Stephan she also doesn’t want to see anyone she cares about upset.
Jade: And just like that, Jade swoops in to steal the quote of the week by saying her “vagina feels like its on fire with f-ing gasoline” on the way home from the hospital. Sean rather tenderly takes care of Jade and baby Kloie. He looks great without a video game controller in his hands!
TELL US – THOUGHTS ON LAST NIGHT’S EPISODE?
Author: Jeannie
Photo Credit: MTV
The post Teen Mom Young And Pregnant Recap: Cutting The Cord appeared first on Reality Tea.
I would have loved to be a fly on the wall when the Vanderpump Rules cast members watched the last episode for the first time. James Kennedy very clearly stated that he “hung out” with ex girlfriend Kristen Doute. Nevertheless, Jax Taylor, Tom Sandoval, Tom Schwartz, and Peter Madrigal were adamant that he said he “hooked up with” her. They called him out for it and spread that rumor to the rest of the cast members.
Throughout the whole episode they truly believed that they heard him correctly. I don’t know if it was the booze, the British accent, or just a confirmation bias to put the spotlight on someone else, but none of the guys were on James‘ side.
Kristen stopped by the Bravo clubhouse to discuss that misunderstanding during the last Watch What Happens Live episode. Andy Cohen pointed out, “He said ‘hung out.'” Then he said, “What did feel like when you saw that for the first time? You threw a drink on him.”
Kristen confessed, “My brain exploded. I texted Katie [Maloney] and Stassi [Schroeder]. I texted the Witches of WeHo like ‘Did you see this the way I saw it?’ And we all rewound it like five times.” I didn’t need to rewind it at all. It was very clear what he said, yet none of the guys wanted to believe him.
Andy asked, “Who were you most mad at?” She answered, “Sandoval and Jax. Both. Sandoval started it and Jax really spread the rumor.”
The interview took a bad turn for Kristen. The viewers and Andy came at her past sins for the rest of the episode. A caller said, “When you were accused of hooking up with Jax, you kind of acted similar how [you were acting] when you were accused of hooking up with James. Why should we believe you now?” Andy chimed in with, “Good question. Why should people believe you now?”
Kristen said, “That’s so unfair.” Andy asked, “Is it?” Kristen was visibly flustered and said, “I’m telling the truth that’s why. Did you see the scene? That’s why.”
Another viewer asked, “Because of everything that happened with Stassi and having lied in the past, I was just wondering why you got so defensive when you were asked about hooking up with James? How do you apologize to Katie and Stassi?” Kristen responded with, “I don’t think I should apologize to Katie and Stassi because I don’t think my best friends should grill me. They know better.”
Apparently that explanation did not sit too well with Andy because he told her, “Yeah, but you cheated behind Stassi’s back.” She responded with, “Yeah. We’ve all grown and changed. I know I didn’t do anything wrong.”
Speaking of Stassi, Kristen was asked, “What do you think of Stassi and her new boo? Another relationship that will be a marriage because of you?” Just in case anyone forgot: Kristen is the one who set up Tom and Katie. She thinks she made a perfect match, yet again. She told Andy, “Yes, absolutely. I think she’ll be engaged before anyone else.”
And then, she was asked about Jax and Brittany Cartwright’s relationship- just like every other cast member has been during every interview this season. She was asked, “Do you think Jax and Brittany’s relationship will last? If not, why?” Kristen admitted, “At this point, strangely enough, I think yes- over time. I think they have a chance.”
RELATED: Kristen Doute Confirms That She & Brian Carter Are Still Together
TELL US- DO YOU THINK KRISTEN AND JAMES ACTUALLY HOOKED UP? IS KRISTEN BEING UNFAIRLY JUDGED BECAUSE OF HER PAST? WHICH VANDERPUMP RULES COUPLE WILL GET ENGAGED NEXT? WILL JAX & BRITTANY’S RELATIONSHIP LAST?
The post Kristen Doute Denies Hooking Up With James Kennedy; Blames Jax Taylor & Tom Sandoval For Spreading That Rumor appeared first on Reality Tea.
Rejoice, RHONY is back! The Real Housewives of New York City finally returns this week, reuniting us with Luann De Lesseps, Bethenny Frankel, Dorinda Medley, Sonja Morgan, Ramona Singer,...
Back in October 2017, Real Housewives of Orange County alum Lizzie Rovsek filed for divorce from Christian Rovsek. It took a couple months for that news to make headlines.
Since then, we haven’t heard much about the divorce proceedings. This could be because Lizzie has stayed away from the spotlight. After all, she was only a Real Housewife for just one season, so her personal life isn’t on display as much as other former Housewives. Or maybe we haven’t heard much about the divorce because it’s not actually happening?
Lizzie shared a photo of herself kissing Christian on the cheek with the caption “#cityoflove #france#magic #anythingcanhappeninparis.” Apparently so. It looks like these two are back together. As of this moment, neither of them have commented on the post, but if you follow Lizzie on Instagram, you can see that she’s shared photos and videos of the former/current couple enjoying Paris together in her Instagram stories.
This is a far cry from December 2017 when Lizzie tweeted, “Thank you to everyone that knows my heart and spirit. Thank you to all that have been supportive. I love you. I truly do.” Maybe absence really does make the heart grow fonder?
RELATED: Real Housewives Of Orange County Alum Lizzie Rovsek Filed For Divorce
TELL US- DO YOU WANT LIZZIE TO RETURN TO REAL HOUSEWIVES OF ORANGE COUNTY? DO YOU THINK LIZZIE AND CHRISTIAN WILL BE ABLE TO WORK THINGS OUT PERMANENTLY?
[Photo Credit: Instagram]
The post Are Lizzie Rovsek & Her Husband Christian Back Together? appeared first on Reality Tea.
Get ready for alliances to shift once again, Real Housewives of New York City fans! When the Bravo reality hit returns for season 10 on Wednesday, April 4, the dynamics amongst the ladies...
Don't cry for them, West Covina, the truth is, Crazy Ex-Girlfriend ending with season four is not just OK, it's great. Please forgive this poor attempt at Evita humor, it seemed right with...
I have no idea why, but for some reason the Real Housewives of Atlanta cast members felt it was necessary to compare Sheree Whitfield and Eva Marcille’s Cleopatra costumes during the Season 10 finale episode. In all honesty, it looked like they both put in an equal amount of effort.
The women pretended to like one costume over the other when they were just actually making their critiques based on which woman they were closer friends with. Kim Zolciak has not had one scene with Eva and she’s openly loyal to Sheree, so of course she preferred Sheree’s costume, but did she really say that Eva, a model, is “not pretty”? Really, Kim? Did she spend enough time talking about roachgate that she had to pretend that Eva was “not even a pretty f***ing Cleopatra”? What was the point of that?
In a post on her Bravo blog, Eva admitted, “I was surprised to hear Kim’s comments about my costume.” So was I, but then again, I’m not. Kim never just shows up to show up. Kim causes a stir every single time she appears on Real Housewives of Atlanta, so why would Eva’s party be any different?
Eva wrote, “There was no need to compare me and Sheree or try and offer an opinion on what is and what is not ‘pretty.’ Who is she to make that judgment? We can both be beautiful with our different versions of Cleopatra!” I agree completely. Plus they both really did look good in their costumes. Is this show so stale that this is actually a plot line now?
Eva explained, “However, her comments do provide perspective into how she conducts herself and why she is struggling to get along with the others. It was unnecessarily mean, and that sort of uncalled for negativity and mean-spiritedness is unbecoming. Ultimately, I felt great at the party and had a ball, and that’s all that really matters!”
Feuding with Kim has become a rite of passage for Atlanta Housewives at this point. On the bright side, having Kim as a hater, could help boost Eva’s chances to become a full-time cast member.
TELL US- WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT KIM’S COMMENTS COMPARING EVA’S CLEOPATRA COSTUME TO SHEREE’S? DO YOU WANT EVA TO BE A FULL-TIME HOUSEWIFE NEXT SEASON?
[Photo Credit: Bravo]
The post Eva Marcille Thinks Kim Zolciak Has “Uncalled For Negativity And Mean-Spiritedness” appeared first on Reality Tea.
Did I miss something on last night’s Vanderpump Rules? Did James Kennedy admit to hooking up “just a little” with Kristen Doute? Even more curious – did the cameras actually miss James and Kristen drunkenly hooking up?!
What I think I observed was a drunken game of telephone. Or whatever it’s called in the iPhone era. Probably something to do with Snapchatting and then sharing Snaps that were deleted and how you thought you were sexting your boyfriend SUPER ROB when in fact you were sending a disgraced Nigerian prince $300 to get his crown out of hock and on a plane to LA to bar tend into his future at SUR. I mean this could finally be the man for Scheana Marie!
Anyway! Using delightful time lapse, the episode opens hours early with Stassi Schroeder sitting on a beach with Katie Maloney and Kristen. The sand is soft and fuzzy – just like their drink-addled memories from every day the night before.
Conveniently Stassi took a sleeping pill and was comatose to the world until 1:30 PM. Conveniently Kristen was out until 8:30am and too drunk to remember past noon the previous day when she returned to the hotel room to shower sand out of her hoohah.
Ahhh! But there is a catch. Neither Kristen nor James made it to their beds – which remain unused the next morning at 8:30am. Where, pray tell, did the DJ and his ex girlfriend go?! Suddenly it’s a SUR-style game of Clue. Who did it, with James Kennedy, in what room? And hopefully with what birth control! It is Jax Taylor who has the next clue because James and Kristen were in the private pool of his suite. They were spotted there at 7:30 am with a bottle of tequila.
Who’s excited for Unsolved Mysteries With Jax Taylor? Cause he is very on the case. With such riveting and finely sourced evidence! Oh goody.
Everything is Scheana’s fault. See Jax couldn’t sleep, because he was so upset after learning that Scheana tried to lure Brittany Cartwright away from him. Not even the bottle of vodka he stuffed down his pants at the bar, combined with all the other alcohol he consumed, could counteract his Schea-rage and make him pass out. He was up early, being morose, when he noticed some strange movement from the pool in his suite. And what did he spy among nature’s beasts? Why James and Kristen! Doing what exactly? We don’t know because in Jax’s words, “James saw me coming and fled the scene.” (with a bottle of tequila stolen from Jax’s room).
The intrigue deepens because when Jax next encountered the so-called crime scene – there were PILLOWS on the pool deck arranged, suspiciously, to make a sort of bed. Perfect for los hooking up-o! “The smoking gun, if you will,” remarks Jax, who decides to abandon his future career as a hockey social media reporter to become a hook up detective. Dude – the irony. The sweet, sweet irony of Jax Taylor becoming a PI who busts cheaters. That actually MUST become a show on Bravo. Kristen could be his business partner! (Cause further irony.)
Um, an aside, but: Why is Jax not mad at Brittany for going on a date? To have dirt to lord over her head at a more convenient time? Also it takes part of the heat off him.
Anyway, back to James and Kristen… We flashback to the last night where Jax is storming out of the club and everyone else is getting trashed. James suddenly comprendes his way into the DJ booth, and in Spanish convinces the DJ to let him take over to play his newest song. “Asta proximo martedes!” triumphs James (Spanish for See You Next Tuesday). And it is a very prescient c-u-next-tuesday indeed. Specifically for Kristen!
There s something infectious about el James-o’s takeover. Suddenly Kristen and Lala Kent are all about the Kennedy’s conejos! Kristen is dropping into splits, wearing prison black and white stripes, and remembering some of the better things about him. They end up laughing and joking together, then taking this party back to Jax’s room late night.
Over at Villa Rosa, Lisa Vanderpump adopts yet another dog which resembles Ken. This fluffy scrap abandoned at Vanderpump Dog rescue goes against her policy of taking dogs “to go” as she walks out the door, but then Lisa remembers all the chances she’s given James who has finally turned out right…
In Mexico Scheana awakes to a delivery of flowers Randall sent Lala. Through pinched lips Scheana insists she’s NOT AT ALL JEALOUS – she’s not a flower person, just like she’s not a kissing person, or a gifts person in general, because she has to make excuses for all the things Rob doesn’t do for her. Scheana even dismisses roses as “basic.” Exactly what flowers say I’m desperate to escape you?
“I don’t like presents,” Scheana sulkily insists to Lala, “I like affection. I guess I’m simple.” Now Lala plays detective and she’s put together clues to ascertain that Rob is just not that into Scheana. “I don’t know why Scehana feels the need to pretend anymore. We see right through you: You’re not gettin’ affection and you’re not gettin’ gifts. Whomp, whomp, whomp…” snipes Lala for the win. Yeah, Scheana give up the ghost, whose name is Rob.
Meanwhile the boys go “golfing”. They’re all dressed like Weekend At Bernies and sipping tequila like it’s midnight, not noon. Only Peter in his tight shorts is sober. Thank God for you Peter. As always.
James and Tom 2 are so hung-over/still wasted they actually hug each other for moral support to get through more drinking, kindling a bromance through survival. Like lean on me and absorb the booze through my pores? The intrigue of The James Kennedy Mystery deepens again because Tom 2 recalls James shirtless and dancing on the bar. He also recalls making out in his tequila-addled stupor but he’s pretty sure that didn’t involve James. (It was Katie) Of course later we find out that Tom 2 also disappeared into the night…
Jax can’t concentrate on golf balls because he is so anxious to reveal the scintillating possibly of James’s balls re-entering Kristen’s hole in one. The second James’s back is turned he regales the other guys with the gossip. Tom 1 is scandalized. And this is where it gets confusing (now I get to play detective). It seems like Tom asked James if he was “hanging out” with Kristen and James answered “maybe a little bit”. Perhaps booze combined with wishful thinking melodrama transformed “hanging out” into “hooking up”? Or maybe it is I who misheard Tom 1’s question cause I am a James apologist even though I cannot condone him calling Brittany fat and projected his anger about Jax lying onto Brittany’s appearance. Lame, anti-feminist, and your hot future Miss USA should seriously dump your trifling ass for this reason, among many.
Anyway, James vehemently denies hooking up with Kristen and gets so upset he actually starts crying with hurt feelings until TOM SANDOVAL tells him to knock it off. Oh the irony!
James doesn’t cheat on his girlfriend and also IT’S NOT ABOUT THE PASTA! But it IS about the pillows! Jax claims to possess evidence of James and Kristen’s hook-up because he took a photo of the pillows propped up on the pool deck. Um, the judge strikes that down.
James took a nap on them, but he DID NOT have sex with Kristen on said pillows because James “doesn’t think Kristen is sexy or hot all.” I mean how dare they! Also it’s not about the pasta. Poor James is just too drunk/hung-over to handle emotions and I get it: he thought he was bonding with these blokes but they just can’t wait to use him to blow-up Kristen’s life. Again.
As Peter eloquently explains: Jax and James are deflectors deflecting their bad relationships onto each other. But the question is: did anyone deflect their bad relationship with Kristen? Actually maybe JAX hooked up with Kristen while James was passed out drunk? I mean, deja vu…
The girls go for a spa day and Scheana cannot wait to gossip about The Case Of The Missing Kristen. Scheana, Brittany, Lala and Ariana all believe something happened. Scheana is salivating over the idea of Carter finding out. Cause she’s a good friend like that! Scheana also predicts Jax has already spilled to both Carter and Raquel – we all know Jax hates to be the lone cheater in any situation, and is eager, as Peter said, to deflect from his own relationship woes! Just as Scheana is!
It is perma-drunken Tom 2 who spins things out of control by mistakenly recounting to Katie that James admitted to hooking up with Kristen. And Katie then tells Kristen, who angrily denies it, then gets angry at Stassi and Katie for even questioning her ethics, morals, and behavior. Really? I have to agree with Stassi – Kristen has a history and it ain’t good! And even if she’s ‘grown up’ some of those same old behavioral patterns still very much lurk. Like Stassi said why put yourself in the position to even be accused?!
Contrarily, Katie knows that Tom + booze = no recollection. The dude blacked out and doesn’t remember cheating on his wife during the best, easiest, most perfect first year of marriage ever. Katie does realize she sounds like Scheana when she brags about how amazingly simple and amazing marriage is? Which brings us to the other disappearance from the night before: Tom 2. While super-wasted he snuck out of his room and wandered until he ended up at a different resort! I think that’s called a Freudian slip. Actually a Freudian blackout. Katie is outraged and once again makes rules about what Tom can and cannot do. Katie the first rule of parenting is you have to STICK TO THE CONSEQUENCES. Please do not spawn.
Anyway, this brings us up to present time.
Kristen is fuming when the rest of the group, absent James, joins them at the beach. Jax now says James confessed to “fooling around a little bit” with Kristen by the hot tub. It is only Peter, eternally sober and good Peter, who knows this is not true. But just in case, like the good person he is, he does his due diligence by asking James. James again insists he NEVER, EVER said anything of the sort. Too bad Tom 1 also co-signed Jax’s story to Kristen!
Poor James presumes Kristen will be mad at JAX for spreading rumors, and is shocked to learn that instead she’s pissed at him for being the one supposedly spreading lies. Are people still in the phase where they believe ANY words that come out of Jax’s mouth? Like if Jax opens his lips, the word LIIIIIIIE just pours out in a puddle of foul-smelling slop.
While the Toms are in Mexico solving true crimes and envisioning a future with their own Netflix documentary, Lisa and Ken are working on TomTom. Actually Lisa, in a hot pink hardhat, is pondering why on earth Brittany has not dumped Jax yet. Two words: Vanderpump Rules.
James tries to preempt further damage by texting Kristen before dinner to let her know he did not say they hooked up, but Kristen is in krazy-kritter mode and has already made up her mind about which liar to believe: Jax. She swears to seek revenge on James, who obviously used her to get approval from the guys. It’s so funny that FOR ONCE James is not doing that!
So many things ridiculous about this dinner! Tom 1 tries to insist all the guys were shorts suits. He is dressed like Fred Flintstone after winning the Powerball, while James is squashed into a hot pink ensemble that makes him look like a Ken Doll. No one else wore their assigned outfits. They eat at a restaurant called “Catch” where someone is surely getting caught in Kristen’s web of rage.
Stassi is in the corner playing Scheana by pretending Patrick cares enough about her to start a fight. He just wanted a reason to escape by creating a ruse to be mad at her so she wouldn’t call him from Mexico. DUH SCHEASSI.
All through dinner Kristen seethes with rage, while Katie, who now has no patience for childishness (AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH……. infinity), continually counsels her to calm down. Not happening; not possible, too late. Kristen is waiting for the moment to strike. She is emboldened by Brittany claiming “everybody” heard James admit to hooking up with her, and then she unleashes.
James and Kristen always go WAY too far. Together they are combustible like a match to gasoline. James initially tries to explain, and accepts that if he said they hooked up, it was either a joke or he was just too drunk to make sense, but then he resorts to puerile name-calling and dismisses Kristen as an attention-seeker. Which she is. But so is he.
Kristen responds by threatening James, then throwing her drink in his face, except it lands all over Lala. The whole thing is a mess. Literally. Ugh – that drink toss just felt so premeditated. Katie is right – just get it together girl.
Lala is appalled that Kristen isn’t a bad enough bitch to just physically assault James and is instead hiding behind hydroponic bitchslaps. Katie is appalled by Kristen’s out of control behavior – she should “grow up” and become a married person with a perfect relationship and a sister wife in tow. Stassi is appalled that Lala is defending James because it’s not Kristen’s fault he lied. Are Kristen and James majorly over-reacting because they don’t remember what happen and are worried they have something to feel guilty over?
(Psssst… I totally think Kristen and James hooked up – at least made out! But it’s been fun to play armchair detective.)
Lala Says Raquel Turns A Blind Eye To James’ Behavior Because She Wants To Be On TV
TELL US – DID JAMES TELL THE GUYS HE HOOKED UP WITH KRISTEN? DO YOU THINK JAMES AND KRISTEN DID HOOK UP?
[Photo Credits: Bravo]
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