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Five celebrities left. One $250,000 prize. Celebrity Big Brother, CBS' first celeb edition of their hit reality show, came to an end on Sunday night, bringing this weirdly wonderful...It’s been a long three weeks, as we watched the Celebrity Big Brother houseguests navigate their way to the end. In these final two hours, one player will emerge victorious. Four will come up a few places short of the Celebrity Big Brother win.
Usually on finale night, we have a pretty good estimation of who will make it to the final two: There are only s few possibilities. However, there are way too many possible outcomes to know who would sit next to whom in the end. By the end of the first hour, we would know the final two.
With an unpredictable jury, we wouldn’t know the winner until the very last minute. Celebrity Big Brother was a nail bitter to the very end.
MAJOR CELEBRITY BIG BROTHER SPOILER AHEAD. PROCCED WITH CAUTION
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The night started with a recap of the last HOH competition, which Ross won. Then we went straight to POV, which Ross also won. This basically meant the end of Omarosa’s game. Mark and Marissa then voted her out by two to one.
It comes down to Mark, Marissa, and Ross with a tie breaker. Marissa wins it by guessing closest to the real answer. Marissa chose to evict Mark and Ari.
Marissa and Ross are the final two. They then must answer jury questions. The whole jury segment was kind of a mess.
But it ending in a Marissa Jaret Winokur win. Then Ross Mathews won America’s Favorite Player.
Keep it here all winter for news, spoilers, recaps, and exclusives about Celebrity Big Brother . We’ll continue to update you on the latest news related to Big Brother. Make sure to subscribe to CBS: All Access to get your live feeds and enjoy more exclusive content. Don’t forget to follow us on Facebook and Twitter to stay updated on all the Big Brother news!
Tonight Celebrity Big Brother needs to evict three people. THREE. This is the most houseguests to be evicted in a single night. Going into tonight’s two-hour Celebrity Big Brother finale, we already know who will be evicted first.
Unless some extreme gaming went down while the feeds were off, Omarosa should be the first evicted tonight on Big Brother: Celebrity Edition. Head of Household Ross Mathews has finally gotten his way, because he won Power of Veto, and convinced Mark McGrath and Marissa Jaret Winokur that getting out Omarosa over Ariadna Gutierrez is best for all of their games.
Once Omarosa leaves the game, we will go straight into the final Head of Household competition. On Friday, Julie Chen explained to viewers that whoever wins this last HOH competition gets to pick who to sit next to in the final two.
This means whoever doesn’t get picked will automatically be eliminated. Julie better have a lot of questions ready, since she’ll have to interview three people tonight.
So which three houseguests left the Celebrity Big Brother house tonight? And who is in the final two? Read below to find out.
MAJOR CELEBRITY BIG BROTHER SPOILER AHEAD. PROCCED WITH CAUTION
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By two to one-Omarosa was the first player evicted.
Marissa won the final Head of Household. She chose to bring Ross with her. This means Ari and Mark are evicted.
Marissa and Ross are the final two.
Keep it here all winter for news, spoilers, recaps, and exclusives about Celebrity Big Brother . We’ll continue to update you on the latest news related to Big Brother. Make sure to subscribe to CBS: All Access to get your live feeds and enjoy more exclusive content. Don’t forget to follow us on Facebook and Twitter to stay updated on all the Big Brother news!
It has only been three days since the finale of our new favorite reality show, WeTV’s Love After Lockup, but we’re already getting some snippets and updates trickling in about what the cast is up to since filming ended. Mary took to Instagram to share what she and Dominic have been up to since their awkward non-wedding on the boat. Mary says they’re happily married, despite Dominic still living in a half-way house.
Mary shares, “First off, I would like to thank everyone who watched Love After Lockup! Without your support and love, the show wouldn’t have been as successful as it has been! A special shoutout and thanks to all the fans of our story! Your words of wisdom, love and hope are very much appreciated it!”
Mary posted, “I wanted to share with you all “where are we now”, not for me but for Dominic’s sake. Our love story is true, authentic and genuine! I am so proud of the man Dominic has become and the amount of success he has had transitioning back into society! Our story and Dominic’s story is a TRUE success story that I could not be prouder of!”
Mary revealed that Dominic not only got a job – he launched his very own business. “Since filming, Dominic has opened his own business! He is one of the hardest and most dedicated workers I have ever known in my life! He’s been extremely successful and lucky working full-time and becoming a contributing part of society! He has many dreams and goals for his career and our future! And I know he is determined to achieve them!”
She added that Dom‘s due to leave the half-way house in March! “Dom is currently still in the halfway house and is on restrictions. However, since he is on good behaviour, he should be getting released from the halfway house by March and will be able to officially live with me!”
Despite (or because of!) living apart, she shared that marriage is great. “We are still happily married and very much in love! We are working together on our careers and future goals as a couple! I am still working in real estate and plan to continue my career in Toronto!”
Best news of all: they are planning a big ass wedding that we can only hope will be filmed for the show. And that our Erin can score an invite for it! Mary shared, “We are still in the process of planning a large wedding in the soon to be near future that will include friends and family! We still want to have the wedding of our dreams and have a celebration of our new life moving forward! We look forward to the day we can share this with you!”
Mary and Dominic are the “perfect example of true love,” she insists. “We still have a lot of “firsts” as a couple and look forward to the adventure that is ahead of us in life! We have proven that this type of relationship and dating/marrying an inmate is possible! This life isn’t for the weak and is extremely hard but doable! And in the words of James, “love will conquer all”. You will not find a more perfect example of true love than in our story! We appreciate all your support and look forward to the exciting road ahead! Love, Mary and Dom.”
TELL US – DO YOU THINK MARY AND DOM WILL LAST ONCE THEY ARE LIVING TOGETHER? ARE YOU LOOKING FORWARD TO SEASON 2?
Photo Credit: Instagram
The post Love After Lockup Update From Mary And Dominic – Dom’s Launched His Own Business And Gets Out of Halfway House In March! appeared first on Reality Tea.
Even though she was back home in Atlanta, Kim Zolciak was the center of attention during the Real Housewives of Atlanta cast to Barcelona. She sent a vicious group text to the entire cast, accusing NeNe Leakes of parking in a handicap parking space and having roaches in her bathroom.
Aside from Kim’s group text, there was the typical Housewives drama over the room selection. NeNe felt like she deserved the best room since she was the oldest one on the trip, but she got mad at Kandi Burruss for using the word “elder” even though NeNe was the one who brought up her own age. It just didn’t make much sense.
In her Bravo blog post, NeNe addressed the room assignment drama with Kandi. She summarized it by saying, “The issue with Kandi was simple: she doesn’t go with the flow, and that doesn’t work on girls’ trips.” In her own Bravo blog, Kandi counters with, “She picked her room first. It’s not my fault she didn’t go to the top floor before making her choice. You’re not going to put me out of a room you passed up.” Exactly.
NeNe attempted to explain explained, “I never got heated over the ‘elderly’ comment — I was trying to explain that it wasn’t the word that I used! I don’t mind being the elder of the group, because I’m very comfortable in the skin that I’m in. This skin, by the way, happens to be black, beautiful, and wrinkle-free!
When it comes to that group text, Kandi admitted, “I thought that it was terrible for her to save roach videos just to wait for a time to make NeNe look bad. This group loves tearing each other down.” Yes they do. NeNe took the opportunity to go on Kim and Sheree Whitfield: “Kim’s text was just another example of how much this girl lies, and she’s really starting to look pathetic now! The girls that manipulated what I said (especially Shereé) really look sh–ty.”
RELATED: Cynthia Bailey Thinks Kim Zolciak’s Group Text About NeNe Leakes Was “Detestable”
TELL US- WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT NENE & KANDI’S ROOM DRAMA? WAS KIM’S GROUP TEXT ABOUT NENE OUT OF LINE? DID SHEREE MANIPULATE NENE’S WORDS TO UPSET KIM?
[Photo Credit: Bravo]
The post NeNe Leakes Calls Out Sheree Whitfield For Manipulating What She Said To Enrage Kim Zolciak appeared first on Reality Tea.
Robin Thicke’s 20-something girlfriend gives birth – Dlisted
Jennifer Lawrence talks candidly about dropping out of school at 14 – Celebitchy
Kylie Jenner’s “push present” is a Ferrari – Page Six
Farrah Abraham says some controversial shit – shocker! – The Ashley’s Reality Roundup
Sad to hear of this Notting Hill actress’s death! She was hilarious – Dlisted
Sunday, February 25
8 PM EST –
Big Brother: Celebrity Edition (CBS) – finale
The Bachelor (ABC)
Guy’s Grocery Games (Food Network)
Real Housewives of Atlanta (Bravo)
Storage Wars: Best of Barry (A&E)
Sister Wives (TLC)
9 PM EST –
Worst Cooks In America (Food Network)
Keeping Up With The Kardashians (E!)
To Rome for Love (Bravo)
10 PM EST –
Shark Tank (ABC) – finale
Revenge Body with Khloe Kardashian (E!)
Seeking Sister Wife (TLC)
11 PM EST –
WWHL (Bravo) – NeNe Leakes and Marlo Hampton
Photo Credit: Justin GoffUK Press via Getty Images
The post Sunday Night Gossip Links & What’s On Reality TV – February 25th appeared first on Reality Tea.
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Are you ready for tonight’s new episode of The Real Housewives of Atlanta? If you need to catch up on last week’s drama, check out the recap here.
What to expect on tonight’s episode, according to Bravo: “In the aftermath of Kim’s text heard ’round the world,’ the women demand that Shereé put her friend in check. Porsha wreaks havoc on the streets of Barcelona, and Cynthia gets over her man problems by taking a dip in the lady pond. It’s all fun and games until things go off the rails during a heated debate. As tensions rise the trip comes to a surprising end for one of the ladies.”
Join us in the comments at 8/7C!
TELL US – SHOULD SHEREE BE HELD RESPONSIBLE FOR KIM’S ACTIONS? SHOULD WE APOLOGIZE TO THE CITIZENS OF BARCELONA FOR INFLICTING THE RHOA CAST ON THEM?
Photo Credit: Bravo TV
The post Virtual Viewing Party: Real Housewives of Atlanta – February 25th appeared first on Reality Tea.
It’s time to check out the reality TV listings and plan your week.
Check out the reality TV listings list, which includes the Watch What Happens Live with Andy Cohen guests for the week, and let us know what you’ll watch.
Sunday, February 25
8 PM EST –
Big Brother: Celebrity Edition (CBS) – finale
The Bachelor (ABC)
Guy’s Grocery Games (Food Network)
Real Housewives of Atlanta (Bravo)
Storage Wars: Best of Barry (A&E)
Sister Wives (TLC)
9 PM EST –
Worst Cooks In America (Food Network)
Keeping Up With The Kardashians (E!)
To Rome for Love (Bravo)
10 PM EST –
Shark Tank (ABC) – finale
Revenge Body with Khloe Kardashian (E!)
Seeking Sister Wife (TLC)
11 PM EST –
WWHL (Bravo) – NeNe Leakes and Marlo Hampton
Monday, February 26
8 PM EST –
The Bachelor (ABC)
The Voice (NBC) – premiere
Love & Hip Hop (VH1)
9 PM EST –
Kids Baking Championship (Food Network)
Vanderpump Rules (Bravo)
Counting On (TLC) – premiere
Teen Mom OG (MTV)
Love & Hip Hop Miami (VH1)
10 PM EST –
Summer House (Bravo)
Siesta Key (MTV)
11 PM EST –
WWHL (Bravo) – James Kennedy and Lauren Wirkus
Tuesday, February 27
8 PM EST –
The Voice (NBC)
My Big Fat Fabulous Life (TLC)
America’s Next Top Model (VH1)
9 PM EST –
Real Housewives of Beverly Hills (Bravo)
Married at First Sight (Lifetime)
Intervention (A&E)
The Challenge (MTV)
10 PM EST –
Chopped (Food Network)
Bethenny & Fredrik (Bravo)
Undercover High (A&E)
11 PM EST –
WWHL (Bravo) – Lisa Rinna and Meghan McCain
Wednesday, February 28
8 PM EST –
Survivor (CBS) – premiere
My 600-lb Life (TLC)
9 PM EST –
Guy’s Grocery Games (Food Network)
Little Women: Atlanta (Lifetime)
Black Ink Crew (VH1)
10 PM EST –
The 685-lb Teen (TLC) – premiere
Catfish (MTV)
VH1 Beauty Bar (VH1) – premiere
11 PM EST –
WWHL (Bravo) – Dennis Quaid and Patton Oswalt
Thursday, March 1
8 PM EST –
RuPaul’s Drag Race: All Stars (VH1)
9 PM EST –
Top Chef (Bravo)
Project Runway All Stars (Lifetime)
Growing Up Hip Hop Atlanta (We tv)
10 PM EST –
60 Days In (A&E)
11 PM EST –
WWHL (Bravo) – Jennifer Lawrence
Friday, March 2
8 PM EST –
MasterChef (FOX) – premiere
Bring It! (Lifetime) – special
Gold Rush: Pay Dirt (Discovery)
9 PM EST –
Married to Medicine (Bravo) – finale
Bring It! (Lifetime) – premiere
Mama June: From Hot to Not (WE tv) – finale
Gold Rush (Discovery)
10 PM EST –
Relative Success with Tabatha (Bravo)
Gold Rush: White Water (Discovery)
TELL US – WHAT DO YOU PLAN TO WATCH THIS WEEK?
Photo Credit: Art Streiber/NBC
The post Reality TV Listings: February 25 – March 2 appeared first on Reality Tea.
It is Celebrity Big Brother finale day, which can only mean one thing: someone is about to walk away $250,000 richer. Either Ross Mathews, Omarosa, Marissa Jaret Winokur, Mark McGrath, or Ariadna Gutierrez will be crowned the first ever US Celebrity Big Brother winner.
With an unpredictable jury, we really don’t know who will win Celebrity Big Brother. However, some players have a better shot at winning the game than others. So who has the best chance to win Celebrity Big Brother? Let’s rank from least likely to win to most likely to win.
Omarosa
Omarosa is only last on this list because she’s leaving in fifth place tonight. If she had somehow won the Power of Veto, Omarosa had a decent chance of winning the game. However, the Celebrity Big Brother players might have felt it was bad for their image to vote Omarosa the winner and had her represent their season. So it would have been a tough call, and close vote if she made it to the end, but now there is no way Omarosa will see the final chairs.
Mark McGrath
Mark has played a solid coaster game. It got him this far, and sometimes that is all you need to do to win Big Brother. Unfortunately, this isn’t one of those seasons. We have an image conscious group of jurors. Their fans and fans of Big Brother would basically have the biggest fit if Mark beats almost anyone in the finals. He just hasn’t done enough to really deserve a win.
Marissa Jaret Winokur
Marissa had a lot potential at the start of Celebrity Big Brother, but that died after the first week. Marissa has been too concerned with making friends and her image. She hasn’t played ruthless enough, or won many competitions. Marissa has just been the Robin to Ross’s Batman. And like Robin knows, you can’t be the star if you’re too concerned with being the sidekick. Marissa could only possibly beat Mark in the end. In a Mark and Marissa final two scenario, it’s basically a toss-up of who the jury believe did slightly more in the game.
Ariadna Gutierrez
Ariadna will probably go out in fourth place, unless she wins the final Head of Household competition. Everyone knows that they have no chance to beat Ari in the finals. She’s played a pretty good game and she’s very likable–a deadly combination in any Big Brother season. It would be great to see someone well liked by the houseguests and fans win, since that’s so rare on Big Brother, but we just don’t know if she’ll be able to pull out that final win that she needs to go to the end.
Ross Mathews
We know Brandi Glanville and Shannon Elizabeth both declared that they would not vote for Ross in the end. We hope that’s not true, because it would make both of them look a little silly and petty if they vote Mark or Marissa over Ross in the finals. He is almost guaranteed to be one of the final two players, since everyone but Omarosa has agreed to take him to the end. Even without those promises, we believe Ross will win the final HOH and take Mark to the end.
Even if Brandi and Shannon stick to their promises about not voting for Ross, he’s still likely to have Chuck Liddell, Keshia Knight Pulliam, Metta World Peace, Ariadna Gutierrez, Marissa, and Omarosa’s votes. It would be a shock if Ross doesn’t win, unless he’s sitting next to Ari, but stranger things have happened on Big Brother.
So who do you think has the best chance to win Celebrity Big Brother?
Keep it here all winter for news, spoilers, recaps, and exclusives about Celebrity Big Brother . We’ll continue to update you on the latest news related to Big Brother. Make sure to subscribe to CBS: All Access to get your live feeds and enjoy more exclusive content. Don’t forget to follow us on Facebook and Twitter to stay updated on all the Big Brother news!
Today is officially the last day in the Celebrity Big Brother house, which means yesterday was the last full day of feeds. The feeds were down for a majority of the day as the Celebrity Big Brother houseguests conducted various ceremonies and competitions.
We’re in for a packed evening with essentially three evictions before we get to the final two. After yesterday’s events, we pretty much know who will finish in fifth place. After winning Head of Household, Ross Mathews once again went after his season long target: Omarosa.
After Ross won Power of Veto, he made it pretty clear that he wasn’t going to change nominations, and wanted Omarosa out the game. Mark McGrath tried a little to push for Ariadna Gutierrez’s eviction. He knew no one could beat her in the end.
Omarosa added to their paranoia by making people believe that the final competition would be physical. Omarosa also didn’t perform very well during the final Power of Veto competition, which made her seem like less of a threat.
Ross believed that Omarosa threw the POV just for that intention. Ross and Marissa Jaret Winokur rushed to tell Ari that Omarosa had been throwing her name under the bus. This made Ari confused how Omarosa could be nice to her one minute, and then betray her the next.
Omarosa’s chances of staying in the game went from slight possibility to no chance.
Earlier that day, Omarosa and Ari had a conversation about the finals. Omarosa encouraged Ari to not take Ross to the end because no one could beat him. Ari promised Ross (like basically all the final four) to take him to the end.
Omarosa stressed to Ari how bad of an idea that would be for her Celebrity Big Brother game.
That’s it for these Celebrity Big Brother Live Feeds updates. Join us again in the summer for more of them. And join us later tonight for all the major Celebrity Big Brother season finale action.
Keep it here all winter for news, spoilers, recaps, and exclusives about Celebrity Big Brother . We’ll continue to update you on the latest news related to Big Brother. Make sure to subscribe to CBS: All Access to get your live feeds and enjoy more exclusive content. Don’t forget to follow us on Facebook and Twitter to stay updated on all the Big Brother news!
Now that the Big Brother celebrities made it through double eviction, with the exception of Brandi Glanville and James Maslow, the time has come to crown a new Head of Household (HOH). There are only five houseguests left inside the Big Brother house. And during the season finalè later tonight, we will be crowning the first ever Celebrity Big Brother winner.
Tonight’s finalè eve episode will feature highlights from the season saved for this special episode. To start things off, the houseguests reminisce about their odd jobs throughout their careeers. Marissa Jaret Winokur wins the award as she was a bathroom attendant at a gentleman’s club in New York City prior to her big break on Broadway. Ross also shared that he worked in farm fields picking fruits and veggies, and he held a job in a plus-size women’s boutique where he was fired for shoplifting.
One of the most hilarious parts of the episode had to revolve around alcohol. The houseguests all agreed that Brandi was the houseguest that consumed 90 percent of the alcohol that was delivered to the Big Brother house. Apparently, Brandi can be a very nasty drunk on most occasions.
Other little tidbits about the Big Brother celebrities include Mark McGrath is a neat freak, Metta World Peace loves boxing and is thrilled he is no longer homophobic, Ross Mathews may not love boxing but owns a George Foreman grill, Marissa says “like” like every other word, there truly is no love loss between Brandi and James, and Omarosa plans to write a tell-all book about her time in the White House.
The HOH competition is called Rocky Mountain Fly and is an endurance competition. The houseguests must remain on their snow skis the longest without falling off to win HOH. Of course, the skis will move like a ski lift and in various directions in order to try and knock the houseguests off sooner than later. Everyone can compete except Omarosa, as she was the last HOH.
With 3 competitions and 2 evictions left after this HOH, who will be crowned the first ever Celebrity Big Brother? Tune in tonight for the season finalè to see who will win Big Brother: Celebrity Edition.
Keep it here all winter for news, spoilers, recaps, and exclusives about Celebrity Big Brother . We’ll continue to update you on the latest news related to Big Brother. Make sure to subscribe to CBS: All Access to get your live feeds and enjoy more exclusive content. Don’t forget to follow us on Facebook and Twitter to stay updated on all the Big Brother news!
How do we say goodbye to a show that’s given us so much in such a short time? We’ve learned how probation works, what not to wear to a Crips wedding, that you can trade cell phones for heroin in prison, that “Meet An Inmate” websites exist, and (my personal fave) how to look up random convicts on www.offender.state like it’s a full time job.
Oh, Love After Lockup! You’ve given me so much, so I’ll repay you with this final recap. Goodbye for now, and we’ll see you again when WeTV rounds up a new herd of convicts and their delusional pen pals to light up our lives again. Until that day, I won’t forget you. Like Alla says in her creepy card, our love is truly UNDISTRUCTABLE.
Since Alla’s relapse, she’s gone to treatment, leaving James to re-read the many letters she sent him from her prison cell. As he pines over his “dream girl” turning into a nightmare, he chuckles, “But isn’t every nightmare a dream?” Um…say what, homie?
This botched attempt at poetry aside, can we talk for a moment about the card James reads – you know, the one where Alla appears to have drawn Slender Man on the front and describes their love as “marrow deep” and “undistructable” on the inside? In short, it is amazing. I plan to use it as my laptop wallpaper from this day forth. #PrisonArt
After James stops by Chris’s house to let him know that, yes, he was right about Alla using again, we check in with Alla. She knows she has a problem, and sought out treatment immediately after her relapse, also telling her probation officer what was up. Since then, she’s spending her time healing and smoking cigs on stoops.
Then in a crazy WeTV time-warp, we flash to three months later! WTF?! Anyhooooo…James and Alla are back together again! She’s looking healthier than we’ve ever seen her, and seems committed to doing things right this time around. Alla knows she has demons to battle, but something tells me James doesn’t fully register what they’re up against.
And sadly, it’s a lot. Because we find out in the final credits that six weeks after filming wrapped, Alla violated her parole and was sent back to prison. James still believes she’s his dream girl, and is committed to waiting for her – AGAIN. Ok, Alla. Time to get those magic markers out again, girl. You’ve got creepy cards to draw!
Speaking of waiting for dream girls, a very beaten down Scott is doing the same in Oxnard, CA, while he rifles through the literal wreckage of his life on the kitchen floor. He’s willing to pay $14k to Lizzie’s lawyer to get her charges knocked down, because he’s a lost soul.
After he breaks the news to Lizzie about her facing 8-12 additional years for the drugs and contraband cell phone he paid for in her possession, she cries her best fake tears and begs him to wait for her. Scott cries real tears, swearing he’ll wait as long as it takes. Which according to Google is 2021. So, I guess that $14k did its magic after all.
Let’s hope Scott does the following by then: Gets into some good therapy, hoses himself down, and clips that fungal thumbnail off. Not necessarily in that order. In the mean time, Lizzie better get busy cutting out more paper snowflakes for her new cell in WI to use as a backdrop for sexy prison selfies.
Since Dominic agreed to marry Mary in a quickie ceremony, she booked a minister ASAP to wed them on a depressing docked boat in Toronto. The dog will serve as witness. Dominic is petrified to go through with it, but much like his days in prison (where something seriously BAD must have happened to him ya’ll), he just follows orders and does a perp walk all the way to the boat that will seal his fate.
Mary is decked out in a red dress, heels she can’t walk in, and an enormous fur coat for the occasion. Essentially, she looks like his fancy captor. And for real, you guys, Dominic legitimately looks like he’s in a hostage situation in every f**king scene. Yo, Dom! Blink twice if you need help! This dude is TRAUMATIZED.
They trade “I do’s” aboard the boat, then walk the literal plank back to their lives on dry land. LOL! I don’t know if producers planned this nearly perfect metaphor for Dominic’s journey, or what. But it’s perfect – in a totally deranged Love After Lockup way. Producers who are about to make more of this trashtastic TV, I salute you.
In the briefest love-affair-that-never-was, we check in with the pathetic Angela again, who is burning leaves outside her trailer and telling her son that 32-year old Tony is still her soul mate. Her son wears the look of every friend, family member, and viewer of this show. It is a look that says, “I pity you, I’m scared for you, and your life is a total disaster.” In short, he’s done here.
So Angela must seek comfort in her friends! Friends who also smoke 2+ packs a day, indulge her in sexy lady photo shoots, and have prison tales to tell! At fellow poor decision maker Brenda’s house, Angela spins her sad story of woe that Tony didn’t show up on release day and she was forced to scream, Are ya’ll from prison? at the bus depot like the town lunatic.
Brenda gets it. She was in prison once too, but her tale is a cautionary one. She admits that she kept several guys on the hook while in lockup because she needed the emotional (and financial) support. But once released, she dumped them flat. Her story should serve as a warning to the completely deluded Angela, but Ang isn’t hearing it. Instead, she just stuffs hundreds of dollars of cash into envelopes for Tony while she keeps a meager $40 to live on back home. Because those commissary Hot Cheetos and Ramen packets aren’t going to buy themselves!
Fix it Jesus. How do I get through this segment without punching my TV? Deep breaths. Okay, let’s preface this whole sh*tshow situation by stating it plainly: Andrea is THE WORST. And in a shocking twist of events, I’m now rooting for 18-year felon Lamar to find someone better than her. (I’m also forming a mom posse to go rescue Andrea’s kids if anyone’s interested. House slippers optional.)
Before we get to the tornado of terrible decisions Andrea starts making, we see yet another car scene (for real: this crew is in the car for 80% of the show) in which Lamar is contemplating how to tell Andrea he can’t move to Utah, and Nyla is asking Lamar about dropping soap in prison showers and if he ever got shanked. You know – family time!
At the beach, Lamar finally breaks the news to Andrea, who reacts thusly: “Oh my god, I’m so confused! I have a lot to think about! I can’t be moving my kids to California!!!” Two seconds later: “Hey kids, you’re gonna live here now! We’re getting MARRIED!” Three seconds later: “You better be happy about this. This is YOUR NEW DADDY!”
Seriously – Andrea’s kids probably took longer to decide what they were going to order at Whataburger earlier than how they feel about being uprooted from their home, lives, friends, and school to move to LA and live with a stranger. Oh. My. God. #FreeNyla #FreeTennison #FreePriscilla
In another spooky time warp, we’re thrust into wedding day itself! WHAT IS HAPPENING? Andrea has morphed from Crazy Mormon Lady into full-tilt Bridezilla, demanding her specially-designed shoes be shipped to her ASAP!!! Also, random Utah friends have suddenly been imported from back home, including AJ, who’s obviously been practicing up on how to be an EVEN MORE HIDEOUS RACIST. Seriously, this chick needs to be beaten with Andrea’s special shoes.
Andrea gives a big speech about how it’s HER day, and nobody better mess it up – she doesn’t care if their families get shot, they get shot, they shoot each other! Don’t tell her about it! She’s THE BRIDE!!!
While she’s speechifying, shoe-screaming, and taking four hours (past the wedding start time) to get ready, AJ is in the bathroom telling producers that she doesn’t even know which one Lamar is because ALL BLACK GUYS LOOK THE SAME TO HER. <screaming emoji faces for dayyyyyys> Also, she’s not happy with the marijuana smell that’s stinking up her awful hairdo.
Pause here to tip our hats to the real hero of this wedding: Lamar’s brave friend who had to walk this wretched b*tch down the aisle, refraining from tossing her off a cliff in the process. Here’s to you, dude!
Andrea’s kids are of course the most mature, lovely, and sane people at the wedding. As they stand by to watch their mother trade vows with Lamar, they can only hope their stepdad will be a more responsible parent than their biological mom – which I’m betting he will be. Andrea coos that Lamar is the love of her life and they’re “all a family now!” – as if she and her kids weren’t a family before? I can’t with this broad. I CANNOT.
Special Alert: Andrea has been posting cryptic pics on social media with the hashtag #PregnancyProblems. Which begs the obvious question: Is this woman spawning AGAIN? Somebody get out there and deep dive on this one. We need answers!
It’s wedding day. So Johnna is getting her hair did by Dolly, who’s making every attempt at cheering up the doomed bride. Johnna can’t believe she’s getting married in five hours to a guy she pressured into engagement straight outta prison. How’d that happen? Hmm.
She’ll be wearing the dress she bought for her rehearsal dinner – a dinner that won’t be happening since Johnna and Garrett decided to elope. Also hot happening: A bridal shower, a bachelorette party, bridesmaids and groomsmen, friends and family in attendance, and Starbucks coffee cups being smashed to the ground by Daddy Johnna. Panic washes over Johnna’s face as she realizes the full picture of her super depressing wedding day.
But it’s only when Johnna is getting ready in a restaurant bathroom across from the beach that the full realization hits her: This is not what she wants. Nope. She waited YEARS for this schmuck to get out of prison just to walk across a highway with some sort of makeshift umbrella-waitress-service and a weirdly hemmed wedding frock? I don’t think so! A fairytale, it ain’t. And this chick is ALL about the fairytale – even if it does involve a felon.
When Johnna and Garrett meet on the beach, Garrett grins because he tied his shoes and got dressed all on his own will have “security” now. But Johnna confesses that she doesn’t want this sham wedding. “Don’t make me do this!” cries the girl who practically forced her fiancé to propose, likely financed her own ring, and bought a house for Garrett before he was even a free man. Garrett’s like, Um – NO PROB! His reaction is relief, which is very telling.
It’s also telling that Garrett and Johnna broke up just 6 weeks after filming wrapped. And the details, which you can see all over the couples’ social media pages, are MESS-Y. I have to admit after reading about the fallout post-show, I’m actually #TeamJohnna now. Who knew? Miracles DO happen! This show changes lives, people.
Until next season, let’s hope that WeTV’s call for more felons and fiancés is working its magic, that MeetAnInmate.com doesn’t experience any technical difficulties, and that Scott and Angela find each other. Because they are actually each others’ destiny.
Writer’s Note: Check out my podcast Pink Shade With Erin Martin for more Reality TV talk (Housewives, 90 Day Fiance, Love After Lockup & more!) – plus a dash of cults & the supernatural. Available on Acast, Stitcher, and iTunes!
TELL US: WILL MARY & DOMINIC LAST? WILL SCOTT, JAMES & ANGELA WAIT FOR THEIR PRISON LOVES? DID JOHNNA ACTUALLY DODGE A BULLET? IS ANDREA THE WORST PARENT EVER, OR WILL HER “NEW FAMILY” BE HAPPY IN LA?
Photo Credit: WeTV
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