Tuesday, March 21, 2017

Tuesday Night Tea And What’s On Reality TV Tonight – March 21st

NEW YORK, NY - MARCH 19: Actor Woody Harrelson attends the 'Wilson' New York screening at the Whitby Hotel on March 19, 2017 in New York City. (Photo by Noam Galai/WireImage)

NEW YORK, NY - MARCH 19: Actor Woody Harrelson attends the 'Wilson' New York screening at the Whitby Hotel on March 19, 2017 in New York City. (Photo by Noam Galai/WireImage)

Woody Harrelson gives up his beloved pot – Dlisted

Anything to keep his mind off the Scientology backlash – The Blemish

One step closer to another royal wedding – Celebitchy

Penelope Cruz to play Donatella Versace in new series – Dlisted

Tuesday, March 21

8 PM EST –
The Voice (NBC)
Bad Girls Club (Oxygen)
My Big Fat Fabulous Life: Extra Fabulous (TLC)

9 PM EST –
Real Housewives of Beverly Hills (Bravo)
Little Women: LA (Lifetime)
The Challenge: Invasion of Champions (MTV)
The Battle of the Ex-Besties (Oxygen)
Face Off (Syfy)
My Big Fat Fabulous Life (TLC)

10 PM EST –
Chopped (Food Network) – premiere
Stranded with a Million Dollars (MTV)
She’s In Charge (TLC)
Chrisley Knows Best (USA)

11 PM EST –
WWHL (Bravo) – Erika Jayne

Photo Credit: Noam Galai/WireImage/Getty

The post Tuesday Night Tea And What’s On Reality TV Tonight – March 21st appeared first on Reality Tea.



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Ilmar, Marcos e Rômulo discutem a relação antes do paredão do ‘BBB17’

Antes de saberem o resultado do paredão desta terça-feira, do “BBB17”, Ilmar, Marcos e Rômulo protagonizaram uma grande discussão de relacionamento. Depois de perguntar sobre o diplomata para Marinalva e Ieda, o cirurgião plástico resolveu chamar o...

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'The Bachelor' couples now: Whom did 'The Bachelor' stars and their final picks ultimately end up with?! (PHOTOS)



See whom each season's The Bachelor star and their final bachelorette pick ultimately ended up married or engaged to!

from Reality TV World latest news stories http://www.realitytvworld.com/news/the-bachelor-couples-now-whom-did-the-bachelor-stars-and-their-final-picks-ultimately-end-up-with%21-%28photos%29-21287.php

Nick Viall -- See 20 of 'The Bachelor' star's sexiest pics! (PHOTO GALLERY)



See 20 of The Bachelor star Nick Viall's sexiest and hottest photos -- especially #13.

from Reality TV World latest news stories http://www.realitytvworld.com/news/nick-viall----see-20-of-the-bachelor-star-sexiest-pics%21-%28photo-gallery%29-21035.php

Mariah Carey narrating 'All I Want for Christmas is You' animated movie



Mariah Carey's All I Want for Christmas is You animated movie has begun production.

from Reality TV World latest news stories http://www.realitytvworld.com/news/mariah-carey-narrating-all-i-want-for-christmas-is-you-animated-movie-1054662.php

Real Housewives of Beverly Hills Tonight: Tensions Continue Between Erika Jayne and Dorit Kemsley

kyle

rhobh

Once again tonight, the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills cast isn’t spending enough time appreciating all that is Hong Kong and instead are spending their entire trip bickering over complete nonsense! This episode consists of Lisa Rinna telling Dorit Kemsely to f*** off while Erika Jayne bashes her for being fake and Eileen Davidson gets her head chewed off for trying to help once again.

On tonight’s episode Erika Jayne and Dorit Kemsley continue to clash and take their hostilities to a whole new level. At some point, Eileen Davidson tries to reason with Erika but uses the wrong words, which completely sets Erika off on an over-reacting rant about her son’s safety. Sigh. Why can’t these ladies have nice things and enjoy their fabulous trip without picking apart every single word of every single conversation?

kyle

The ladies take a journey to visit the second largest Buddha in the world, attempting to find a little bit of zen but all Kyle finds is a whole lot of anxiety!  Kyle Richards, LVP and Dorit head out in one glass-bottomed gondola as the rest of the cast hop in another. Probably a good idea to keep Dorit and Erika separated from here on out. And Dorit and Rinna. And Eileen and Erika. Can’t we all just get along already??!! This is getting exhausting.

The insanity kicks off at 9/8CST, so join us in the comments to over-analyze every detail.

Erika Jayne will also be on Watch What Happens Live at 10 p.m. EST.

Photo Credit: Bravo TV

The post Real Housewives of Beverly Hills Tonight: Tensions Continue Between Erika Jayne and Dorit Kemsley appeared first on Reality Tea.



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Nick Viall: Vanessa Grimaldi in 'Dancing with the Stars' audience makes me feel more comfortable, she's very supportive



Nick Viall didn't have the best showing on Dancing with the Stars' Season 24 premiere, but it was apparently good enough to make his The Bachelor fiancee, Vanessa Grimaldi, proud.

from Reality TV World latest news stories http://www.realitytvworld.com/news/nick-viall-vanessa-grimaldi-in-dancing-with-stars-audience-makes-me-feel-more-comfortable-she-very-supportive-21686.php

Southern Charm Exclusive: Kathryn Dennis Builds A Girl Squad For Season 4

kdfive

Photo Courtesy of Kathryn Dennis

Season three of Southern Charm saw Kathryn Dennis the odd-girl-out, with only friend of the cast Jennifer Snowden at her side, but my how things have changed since the end of that season. For season four of Southern Charm, Kathryn is back, and she has regrouped, and now has her own girl squad of sorts, and there is peace with all of the other Southern Charm ladies. Well, almost all of the other ladies.

For season four of Southern Charm, Kathryn found her self warmly welcomed by Naomie Olindo, girlfriend of cast member Craig Conover, Danni Baird, and her old friend, Elizabeth Sermetplus, Chelsea Meissner, Southern Charm friend, and former Survivor contestant. Kathryn now says with season four of Southern Charm behind her, that all is still well with this group of ladies. “I love them all! I find this group real, and they are all awesome!’

CLICK THE CONTINUE READING BUTTON FOR MORE!

Photo courtesy of Kathryn Dennis

Photo courtesy of Kathryn Dennis

Kathryn says the she even got along with another star of the Southern Charm cast, Cameran Eubanks, and says that she had a blast on the trip that everyone took to Key West for Cameran’s birthday. While Kathryn and Cameran are still not tight, she says that as cast mates, they have no issues.

RELATED: An Update On Landon Clements’s Travel Blog, Roam

 

Photo courtesy of Kathryn Dennis

Photo courtesy of Kathryn Dennis

But that naturally brings us around to the Southern Charm cast member that has been the bane of Kathryn‘s existence since she showed up back in Charleston to put her life back together after her divorce from James Maby, and that’s Landon Clements. #Spoileralert: things are no better between Kathryn and Landon, but Kathryn claims that the only thing she can control is the way she reacts to Landon (c’mon KD, we know you will be still making those crazy faces).

And speaking of crazy, remember last season, at the Southern Charm reunion, when Landon and Thomas Ravenel  kept trying to convince Kathryn that there was nothing going on between them, and when Landon went with Thomas to Savannah on Kathryn’s Valentine’s Day trip, it was simply platonic, even though they shared a room at the plantation house? Well, Southern Charm season four will have Landon and Thomas making it official (even if it doesn’t last, hint, hint).

But there is one more member of the Southern Charm family that will never accept Kathryn, and according to KD, that’s just fine with her. Patricia Altschul, mama of Whitney Sudler-Smithcontinues to speak ill of Kathryn, and Kathryn has nothing much to say about “Patsy,” as she says she seldom thinks about her.

But for season four of Southern Charm, Kathryn says she is glad she came back, because there is a real sense of camaraderie amongst the Southern Charm ladies. #GirlPower

TELL US: ARE YOU SURPRISED THAT KATHRYN GOT BACK IN WITH THE GIRLS ON SOUTHERN CHARM?

Photo Credits: Kathryn Dennis

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The post Southern Charm Exclusive: Kathryn Dennis Builds A Girl Squad For Season 4 appeared first on Reality Tea.



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What Do Yolanda Hadid, Cher and Anjelica Houston All Have in Common? Lifetime TV Projects

Cher, Yolanda Hadid, Anjelica Houston Lifetime just announced a whole slate of upcoming projects and boy is the list of talent involved interesting. Never before have Cher, Melissa Joan Hart, Anjelica Houston and...


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Johnny Hayes: Success on 'The Voice' is 80 percent mental preparation and not all about talent



Johnny Hayes talks about his The Voice experience so far -- including where he thinks he went wrong when auditioning for Season 11 of the show when he didn't make a team.

from Reality TV World latest news stories http://www.realitytvworld.com/news/johnny-hayes-success-on-the-voice-is-80-percent-mental-preparation-and-not-all-about-talent-21685.php

Josh West on 'The Voice': Coach Adam Levine was an obvious choice but Gwen Stefani almost had me!



Josh West talks about his Blind Audition on The Voice and why joining Adam Levine's team seemed like the perfect choice.

from Reality TV World latest news stories http://www.realitytvworld.com/news/josh-west-on-the-voice-coach-adam-levine-was-an-obvious-choice-but-gwen-stefani-almost-had-me%21-21684.php

Reality Star Sightings: Cast Of Famously Single, Real Housewives of Potomac, Lisa Rinna And More

LOS ANGELES, CA - MARCH 18: Chef / TV Personality Curtis Stone (L) and Actress Lindsay Price (R) attend the grand opening party for WeVillage at WeVillage on March 18, 2017 in Los Angeles, California. (Photo by Paul Archuleta/FilmMagic)

LOS ANGELES, CA - MARCH 18: Chef / TV Personality Curtis Stone (L) and Actress Lindsay Price (R) attend the grand opening party for WeVillage at WeVillage on March 18, 2017 in Los Angeles, California. (Photo by Paul Archuleta/FilmMagic)

Check out this week’s reality star sightings … so far! Chef Curtis Stone and his wife, actress Lindsay Price, attended the grand opening party for WeVillage in Los Angeles.

Many reality stars were on the red carpet for the NBC Universal Summer Press day in L.A.  Some of the cast members of Real Housewives of Potomac: Karen Huger, Gizelle Bryant and newbie Monique Samuels, as well as the new season’s members of Famously Single, including Ronnie Magro-Ortiz and Dorothy Wang. And we can’t forget Botched stars Dr. Terry Dubrow and Dr. Paul Nassif!

Lisa Rinna and her family turned out to support Erika Jayne at the Dancing with the Stars premiere party.

Also spotted out and about: David Foster, Scott Disick, Kelly Bensimon and more.

CLICK THE CONTINUE READING BUTTON FOR THE PHOTO GALLERY!

Photo Credit: Paul Archuleta/Film Magic/Getty

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Maksim Chmerkovskiy: I'm marrying Peta Murgatroyd at the "perfect" venue



Maksim Chmerkovskiy plans to marry Peta Murgatroyd at the "perfect" venue later this year.

from Reality TV World latest news stories http://www.realitytvworld.com/news/maksim-chmerkovskiy-im-marrying-peta-murgatroyd-at-perfect-venue-1054648.php

Do Romance Rumors Hurt or Help Dancing With the Stars Couples?

Sharna Burgess, Bonner Bolton, Dancing With the StarsShowmance or real deal? That is the question when it comes to bull rider Bonner Bolton and professional dancer Sharna Burgess after the Dancing With the Stars premiere on Monday night,...


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Katie Maloney And Tom Schwartz Explain Why They Didn’t Pay For His Family To Go To The Wedding; Andy Cohen Reveals That Mike Shay Showed Up For The Reunion

katie-tom

katie-tom

I can’t believe I’m saying this, but I was actually pretty moved by Katie Maloney and Tom Schwartz wedding. I know we didn’t even get to the actual vows part yet, but it was so sweet when Jax Taylor and Tom Sandoval surprised Schwartz by flying out his triplet brothers to attend the wedding.

It was really nice, but a lot of the viewers were so confused by the couple spending so much money on towel invitations and flower arrangements instead of paying for his family to attend the event. Still, this is a way nicer criticism than the hate the couple has faced all season in response to their drunken arguments.

CLICK “CONTINUE READING” FOR MORE

Tom and Katie addressed this during their appearance on Watch What Happens Live. Schwartz told Andy Cohen, “I just want to go on the record and say I had no idea how much she was spending on flowers and she paid for the flowers actually, but yeah it’s a bad look and our budget was already spread so thin. They couldn’t get off work too. It was complicated.” It’s hard for me to get mad at Schwartz (not that I actually know him), but I just don’t totally get that. Although I obviously don’t know the specifics of their schedules and financial situation.

Katie said, “I paid for some of my family travel and I was just swamped with preparation and everything. It was so stressful. I could not have switched focus for like five minutes.” I feel like if anyone should have budgeted for the triplets to be present, it should have been Schwartz instead of Katie, but obviously it all worked out for everyone.

Speaking of Schwartz’s financial situation, a caller asked Schwartz if he has another job aside from doing the show and he admitted, “I used to do commercials with modeling, but with the show I don’t have a lot of time to do anything else. Is that a lame answer?” Andy confirmed, “Yeah.”

RELATED: Katie Maloney Says She & Tom Schwartz “Hit Rock Bottom” In New Orleans & That They Are “Reconnected & Recommitted”

Aside from those awkward conversations, Tom actually had something super sweet to say when a caller asked him about the point he knew he would go through with the marriage. He said, “I know it looks rough and the seas were choppy. I know it sounds a little cliche, but I had this moment where a breeze blew in the window and I was watching her sleep and I was like ‘I love this girl and I’m going to marry her.”

Andy asked if “Tequila Katie or Tequila Tom made an appearance” since Schwartz and Katie got married, which is something we all wanted to know. They both said “No” about Tequila Tom. As far as Tequila Katie goes, Schwartz revealed, “I’ve seen a glimpse, but she hasn’t reared her full.” And Katie said, “Tequila Katie can also be fun to be around” which Andy (and the viewers) definitely did not believe.

Andy asked the duo if they had sex on their wedding night and (unfortunately) Tom revealed, “She passed out in our little cottage and I passed out on the stoop of the main house.”

Aside from talking about their own relationship, they discussed Scheana Marie Shay and Mike Shay. They didn’t reveal too much except for the fact that Shay actually appeared to to make tape the reunion, which I think is very surprising since he’s been notably absent all season.

Even Andy admitted, “It was very heavy at the reunion when Shay came. That was one of the most awkward things I’ve ever been in the middle of.” All Schwartz had to add was the word “palpable.” Katie recalled, “I remember it just being like silence. We had not stopped talking and all of sudden you could hear a pin drop.” I cannot wait to see all of that go down.

RELATED: Andy Cohen Is Surprised By What The Vanderpump Rules Cast Did After The “Intense” Reunion Taping

TELL US- DO YOU THINK THAT TOM & KATIE SHOULD HAVE PAID FOR THE TRIPLETS TO TRAVEL TO THE WEDDING? ARE YOU SURPRISED SHAY SHOWED UP FOR THE REUNION?

Photo Credit: Instagram

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The post Katie Maloney And Tom Schwartz Explain Why They Didn’t Pay For His Family To Go To The Wedding; Andy Cohen Reveals That Mike Shay Showed Up For The Reunion appeared first on Reality Tea.



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Emilly lembra de teste de gravidez ter dado positivo, mas era alarme falso

Emilly, na tarde desta terça-feira, contou a Marcos que já se surpreendeu com um teste de gravidez que deu falso positivo. Numa conversa com o cirurgião, a confinada contou que a situação aconteceu quando ela se relacionava com um...

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The Real Housewives Of Potomac Taglines Have Been Revealed

THE REAL HOUSEWIVES OF POTOMAC -- Season:2 -- Pictured: (l-r) Monique Samuels, Robyn Dixon, Ashley Boalch Darby, Gizelle Bryant, Karen Huger, Charrisse Jackson-Jordan -- (Photo by: Tommy Garcia/Virginia Sherwood/Bravo)

THE REAL HOUSEWIVES OF POTOMAC -- Season:2 -- Pictured: (l-r) Monique Samuels, Robyn Dixon, Ashley Boalch Darby, Gizelle Bryant, Karen Huger, Charrisse Jackson-Jordan -- (Photo by: Tommy Garcia/Virginia Sherwood/Bravo)

One of the most exciting things about waiting for a new season of Real Housewives to start is the reveal of the cast member taglines. To be honest, the first season of Real Housewives of Potomac wasn’t the greatest, but I’m optimistic about Season 2 after seeing the trailer.

For the most part, I am actually pretty entertained by the ladies’ taglines for the upcoming season. Let’s just hope that they deliver when it comes to bringing the drama. This is their last chance- in my eyes at least. Thankfully (most of) the taglines are pretty promising.

CLICK “CONTINUE READING” FOR MORE

Some ladies really nailed it with their intro words and others fell flat. Check out the new taglines for Real Housewives of Potomac’s second season.

Ashley Darby

Potomac-Tagline-Ashley-Darby

[Photo Credit: Tumblr]

Last season Ashley Darby took a lot of flack as the young one who was new to Potomac. Her tagline “I’ve played by Potomac rules, but now it’s time to play by my own” is exactly what I want to see from her. Let’s hope she lives by this mantra.

Charrisse Jackson-Jordan

Potomac-Tagline-Charrisse-Jackson-Jordan

[Photo Credit: Tumblr]

I was hoping that Charrisse Jackson-Jordan would have a tagline about being a fiercely independent woman. I can see how “Why cry over spilled milk, when you can laugh over champagne” could relate to Charrisse moving on from her rocky marriage, but I just wanted her to say something more definitive. Even though I was hoping for something different given the context, this tagline is great on its own.

Gizelle Bryant

Potomac-Tagline-Gizelle-Bryant

[Photo Credit: Tumblr]

For someone who talks a lot of shit, I figured that Gizelle Bryant would have a tagline that was actually clever. “Word on the street is, I’m still the word on the street” falls short for me.

Karen Huger

Potomac-Tagline-Karen-Huger

[Photo Credit: Tumblr]

Based on the trailer, it looks like the ladies are looking to knock Karen Huger down from her high horse of etiquette and pretentiousness. Karen claiming, “Potomac put me on a pedestal and the view is spectacular” is pretty pompous, but that is the essence of reality TV persona.

Robyn Dixon

Potomac-Tagline-Robyn-Dixon

[Photo Credit: Tumblr]

I hate being a hater, but once again I have to say that this line is kind of weak. Sorry, Robyn Dixon, but “Don’t let the green eyes fool you, I’m as real as they come,” doesn’t really do much for me. I was hoping for something about her unusual relationship with her live-in ex husband.

Monique Samuels

Potomac-Tagline-Monique-Samuels

[Photo Credit: Tumblr]

I don’t know anything about the new girl Monique Samuels, but I am a fan of her tagline. I have no idea if “I may be rough around the edges, but baby, so are diamonds” actually applies to her personality, but we shall see soon enough.

RELATED: Real Housewives Of Potomac Season 2 Premieres April 2 – Check Out The Trailer

TELL US – WHICH REAL HOUSEWIVES OF POTOMAC TAGLINE DO YOU LIKE THE BEST? WHICH TAGLINE FELL SHORT FOR YOU?

[Photo Credit: Tommy Garcia/Virginia Sherwood/Bravo]

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Erika Girardi's Epic Real Housewives of Beverly Hills Meltdown Is Finally Here: Find Out What She Goes Through at Night

The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, Season 7, RHOBHIt takes a lot to ruffle Erika Girardi's feathers. As fans of The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills know well, the new fan-fave doesn't not dive headfirst into the shouting matches...


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Bonner Bolton and Sharna Burgess talk 'Dancing with the Stars' chemistry and apparent grope



Bonner Bolton and Sharna Burgess are opening up about their explosive chemistry on Dancing with the Stars and the questionable crotch grab seen around the world. 

from Reality TV World latest news stories http://www.realitytvworld.com/news/bonner-bolton-and-sharna-burgess-talk-dancing-with-stars-chemistry-and-apparent-grope-21683.php

Vanderpump Rules Recap: When Two (Almost) Become One

Katie wedding gown

Katie wedding gown
The countdown is finally over! We Vanderpump Rules watchers have finally arrived at the inevitable nuptials of two people so solely unhappy together it’s almost not funny. So, yes, last night was the debut of Katie Maloney‘s wedding gown and it was even worse than Scheana Marie‘s. But the biggest shock was that Tom 2 actually seemed happy to be getting married. That’s a change!

Tom and Katie spent $51,000 on a wedding in someone’s backyard next to the train tracks, yet Tom couldn’t afford to fly his family out to attend. Only his mom, Kim, the object of Jax Taylor‘s wanton obsession, has made it. Thus far anyway. I guess Jax imagines that Kim is a woman who knows how to make a turkey sandwich?

Anyway, call me confused but wouldn’t you factor ‘flying family to wedding’ into your budget above $10,000 worth of flowers, or a $4,000 Tacky Tuesday rehearsal dinner? Was Tom 2 too afraid of Katie’s wrath or something… Likely he actually fears Katie’s combined forces with Stassi Schroeder, the official plus one of his wedding and entire life. Yes, after all her maneuvering Stassi has finally secured the spot of Maid Of Honor. Unofficially so as not to hurt Kristen Doute‘s feelings, but honestly where else would one place their Celestial Wife in the order of things?

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Kristen explains that Stassi being MOH is a mere technicality because she and Tom 1 refused to walk down the aisle next to each other, and since Tom 2 has THREE brothers, none of whom he prioritized over Katie’s flower demands, Tom 1 is the Best Man. Officially. Because where else does one place their Celestial Husband and Soulmate Of Your Heart? Yet, Tom 1, like Tom 2’s actual relatives, is not here. Tom and The Triplets all missed their flights and floating around in the nether space.

Tom 2 tubing

So they all go tubing to distract Tom 2, who calls for Tom 1 over and over again from the riverbanks. Suddenly like a mirage, Tom 1 appears sitting on the riverbanks, surround by Coors Light. It is no apparition. It is reality! Tom and Tom, for one brief second, almost throw caution down stream like an empty beer can to kiss. Then they remember themselves. Instead Tom 2 uses his glee to mount a giant inflatable flamingo, while Tom 1 submits himself to Ariana Madix, then winds up in a tense conference with Jax about the wayward triplet brothers. Will it take planes, boats, automobiles, and plastic floaties to get the triplets here? You betcha!

vanderpump-rules-season-5-tom-and-katie-wedding-weekend-activities-10-min

This wedding! I’m from WV and have seen my fair share of country ‘sheek’ weddings – mason jars with cocktails, and baby breath in the bride’s hair, chalk signs… yada, yada, yada… But something about this wedding – it was kinda like some wannabe ‘Necks up in Cali trying to play at kitschily at backwoods cause it’s a ‘thing’. It was just sad. That place seriously looked like a normal house with a normal backyard, and there’s nothing romantical about your ceremony being interrupted by a train whistle. Maybe the train is strategically placed in case a desperate groom wants to hop a freight to escape?

But for now Tom 2 is feeling the love. Especially towards the only member of his family he thinks could attend, his beloved mama Kim, who does a Fireball shot with him to celebrate. Tom proudly gives her a diamond ring as a token of his appreciation. Blessedly Katie has also calmed way the f–k down!

Lisa Ironing

Even Lisa Vanderpump is feeling the country vibe as she finds herself in a quaint hotel room using an iron for the first time since 1986. Back when she used to iron Max’s nappies and starch his metallic pink, custom monogrammed, Irish linen burp rags herself. Ken is so bemused he takes a photo of Lisa, in what is surely a bathrobe stolen from Yolanda Foster, working the iron in a bathroom so small that if it were at Villa Rosa it would only belong to Giggy. And he wouldn’t even have to share with Harrison!

Screen Shot 2017-03-21 at 10.47.29 AM-min

$4,000 worth of tacos, smacking a piñata jokingly named Lala Kent, all washed down with Coors Lite has put everyone in higher spirits. Finally! Best of all, The Triplets have finally arrived! They look like smaller, furrier Tom 2‘s. At the sight of them walking in one-by-one, like a rag-tag Von Trapp family, Tom 2 bursts into tears. “I know so many wonderful people,” he bawls, hugging Tom and Jax over and over. I’m guessing most of those wonderful people are on the groom’s side, although Katie secured a few good eggs herself. Like her dad, who is sweet and adorable.

Tom's Brothers arrive

Of course, then there is Stassi. While tubing she had a meltdown over river water and whined, “I don’t like diseases of any kind!” This from the woman who dated Jax. And this from the woman who at the rehearsal dinner regales her own mother with a story of meeting some guy on a dating app, and on the first date letting him go down on her like seven times until she cried. She does not expect to hear from him again.

Stassi is momentarily redeemed during a tender moment with a slightly sloshed LVP who gently informs Stassi of what a disappointment she is. Stassi admits she’s made some mistakes, which hopefully someday she can remedy. Perhaps. But admitting you have a problem (or are the problem) is half the problem. This is the step where Scheana Marie has found herself stuck.

RELATED – What Went Wrong With Scheana & Shay?!

Shay, per usual is nowhere to be found. In fact rather than spend time with Scheana at the rehearsal dinner he is sleeping in their room with a pillow over his head. Scheana continues headlong into the descent of her delusion as she gushes to Lisa that she and Shay have “gotten their spark back” and are more in love than ever! Um… whatever happy pills she’s on, she needs to share with Stassi and Katie!

Lisa smiles and nods, and makes a note in her iPhone to call her divorce attorney friend about a new client.

Tom and Jax

The next morning everyone is bright-eyed, bushy-haired, and ready to get their wedding on. The only thing not ready are the vows! Neither Tom nor Katie could find the time (or emotional wherewithal) to write them. Because they can’t find the love? These two and their priorities! They don’t spend money on family and they don’t spend time writing vows, but there are flowers scattered on the forest floor to create a life-sized fairy garden effect. And tacos.

In the bride’s quarter, Katie sits down to the breakfast of champions: beer, whiskey, edibles, and bacon, then proceeds to hair and makeup as hovered over by Evil Stepsister Kristen, who is plotting to shove Stassi off the maid-of-honor platform and glide into the spot herself. Kristen will make herself the most indispensable bridesmaid Ho-Ha-Hoe there ever was. She orders Carter to run to the liquor store, she is arranging hair and makeup, she is assembling Katie’s weird beaded flower arrangement which looks like a ton of broaches stolen from people’s grandmas, set on a pincushion, and then wrapped with tulle.

Tom and his mom

The groomsman, plus Ariana, first go fishing so Tom 2 can bathe away his sins in the river. Back at the groom’s quarters, Jax is on Triplet Patrol, ordering them around like a three-tired Brittany Cartwright, demanding they iron ties, get their suits out, brush their teeth, etc. Real Man Of Honor, Tom 1 has a suitcase filled with all manner of curiosities: extra ties, extra socks, extra balls should the groom need a pair… it’s all here for your imagination and procurement!

One hour before the wedding, Tom 2 finally sits down to write his vows. On an actual piece of paper. He is interrupted by a bee, then realizes the time, plasters his hair down with river water and other detritus, steps into his suit, and is off to meet his maker.

Katie wedding gown

Things are going a little less smoothly for the bride. Literally. Katie can’t fit into her dress. After all her laborious preparations to make this day a reality – all the sanity, good graces, and relationships she’s sacrificed, it may all be for naught because she Taco Tuesday’d herself right out of her wedding gown. The only thing she’s shedding for the wedding is the boning sewn into the dress, which Kristen is snipping out with eyebrow scissors. Finally Katie is zipped into a giant bedazzled pair of pantyhose. Everyone oohs and aaahs because that is the responsibility of a Bridesmaid Ho-Ha-ha!

And then they are off.

Brittany walks down the aisle imaging her own wedding. It will take place in a castle in Kentucky. In the winter. Filled with roses. She will carry a turkey sandwich and wear a body condom. At the end of the aisle there will be Jax sweating profusely and being held down by the Sherry. It will be magical for sure!

Stassi smugly takes her place to the right of Katie, while Kristen forces a tight smile.

Ariana wears her suit better than any of the boys and walks a giggling Scheana down the aisle. Tom 1 feels his heart constrict with love as he sees his two best mates: Tom 2 and Ariana together in this place of love, wearing tight trousers, and it is everything a metrosexual man child could ever hope for. Finally Katie begins her descent up the aisle, where Lisa is waiting dressed all in black (like she was actually preparing for a funeral) to officiate the wedding that almost never was.

RELATED – Tom & Katie Promise They’re Happily Married!

The Wedding

The funniest thing was everyone admitting they never thought the wedding would actually happen, and that as little as two weeks ago, Sandoval and Jax were seriously counseling Tom 2 to call the whole thing off and save himself. Yet here they are… Here. They. All. Are… Well Stassi and Kristen seem overjoyed, crying that two of their favorite will soon become one, and then Tom will be cocooned into the black widow’s embrace of the Three-headed Shebeast. For-Ev-Ver.

Next week – the conclusion and the season finale!

TELL US – WHAT DO YOU THINK OF KATIE’S WEDDING GOWN? ARE YOU SURPRISED TOM 2 ACTUALLY MADE IT TO THE WEDDING?

[Photo Credits: Bravo]

The post Vanderpump Rules Recap: When Two (Almost) Become One appeared first on Reality Tea.



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