Once is an accident. Twice is a coincidence. Three times is a trend. But what does four mean? The Bachelorette has a tell, y'all! While we already know that Becca Kufrin ends her...
Roseanne is no more. After Roseanne Barr's latest offensive tweets aimed at former Obama adviser Valerie Jarrett, ABC Entertainment president Channing Dungey has announced that the...The long holiday weekend is over. Shall we celebrate by dissecting some entitled young people screaming at each other? I say yes! Let’s dig into this week’s Teen Mom: Young and Pregnant recap, followed by Teen Mom 2 highlights from last night’s episode.
Round 1
Kayla Sessler: Kayla is excited to start college. She has a new love interest ‘she be textin’. Why do I think perhaps she’ll be taking remedial English as one of her first classes?
Brianna Jaramillo: Brianna has all kinds of time to hang out with friends now that Danae is out of the picture. Who has the baby? All kinds of time with a little baby at home, don’t you have to take care of him? Also, does Victoria Secret have a sponsorship with these girls? And did she cut the shoulder out of that sweatshirt or do you now pay $60 for one that is cut up? Sorry about that, my grandmother’s voice somehow traveled 400 miles to take over my mind for a second there.
Jade Cline: It is 3 weeks since Sean was kicked out of the apartment. He takes the baby for the night. The next day they meet up and decide to live together without being together. Semantics matter.
Lexi Tatman: Lexi is going out with friends. One of these girls’ names is Kiersha? She shoves her promise ring into Lexi’s face. The other girl, who I didn’t even see a name for, also presents a ring and rubs a little more salt into Lexi’s wounds. Here’s the thing, I’ve never known someone with a promise ring to actually end up marrying the guy who gave it to her. These girls think they have life all figured out though and they are rather enjoying being ‘superior’ to Lexi. They are not superior to her. Also, I hated promise rings before this and they did nothing to redeem them.
Ashley Jones: Bar’s brother is in jail. Shen is going to come as the whole family is anxious for his trial date and to find out his fate. Ashley is going to try to deal with Shen and let her see the baby.
Round 2
Brianna: Brianna also has a new love interest. She flirts with him. He seems barely awake.
Kayla: Stephan reached out for the first time since losing his sanity on her mother. She has him over again without her mom home. WHAT?! Stephan is a trainwreck of a person but Kayla is just a spoiled brat. They fight again. The way he reacts must indicate the substance he is abusing. I don’t know enough about such things to have an educated guess, but I bet an addictions counselor could peg it from the footage. And Miss Kayla knows what she is doing. She taunts him with her social media to get reactions and then plays all shocked when he yells. We all know he’s unstable, so this whole thing is gross, borderline abusive, and they need to be putting the baby above this relationship.
Jade: Sean is back on the couch. They are going to try counseling.
Ashley: Ashley meets her mom. She got a job. Her mom has reservations about Bar. Her mom also has reservations about Shen and meddles with Ashley’s mindset to be an adult and give her a chance.
Lexi: Lexi bugs Kyler about being together. AGAIN?! Really? He finally says yes.
Kayla: Kayla tells her mom about her classes and Stephan. News flash, she and Stephan are still mad at each other. Um, I’m still mad at both of you too.
Round 3
Brianna: Brianna is sitting on the couch making a bottle with very unwashed hair. Her mom comes in lugging a box of diapers. Mom teases her about having a hickey on her neck but advises she take it slow and not get too serious with anyone new.
Jade: Jade and Sean head off to counseling. Sean cries. He does seem to have a big heart and to really truly care about her. Jade seems really over the relationship though, and I give her some credit for trying knowing he is her partner for parenting but they can’t salvage a romantic relationship.
Lexi: Lexi tells her mom she and Kyler are back together. She pumps in the car. It’s a mom rite of passage so good for her.
Ashley: Ashley is going to work. She is having second thoughts about Shen coming to their house. They get in the car and that car seat is moving way too much, it can’t be properly installed. She tells Bar at the last minute she doesn’t want his mom at their house.
Teen Mom 2
Again, the recap starts with Young and Pregnant but I know everyone is also so invested in these TM2 girls we can’t ignore them right?
In TM2 land we (finally) made it out of the hallway. We also appear to be done with the reunion episodes. What a relief.
First Look
Kailyn Lowry: Kail is over Javi and apparently unbothered by anyone he dates -especially Bri. Ok? Were the last two episodes just a fever dream then? She also claims to have kept herself together for this reunion and Jo jokes they might have to change the name to Adult Mom. Haha, slow your roll buddy, and wait for the footage.
Leah Messer: Leah and Jeremy are going trick or treating together. She tells her friend (who I don’t think we’ve ever seen before) that the reunion was a mess so she hung out with her hairstylist. Way to avoid that hallway of horrors!
Briana DeJesus: Javi apparently asks about Briana’s kids more than their fathers. Great, just great.
Chelsea Houska: Chelsea announces to the world that she is off birth control and has an app and ovulation tests. Honestly, she is just a little too open with her film crew and knowing this is going out to all of us. And I guess since she’s telling everyone else it’s no big deal that Aubree is right there in the room hearing all of this too.
Jenelle Evans: Jenelle is still mad at Barb and Nathan but she did get those dreadful little braids out of her hair. She met with Jace’s therapist and everything is Barb’s fault. During a call with David, Jenelle mentions all kinds of upcoming therapy. We also learn that David apparently reassures Jace by saying ‘you know I would never hurt you’, um what pray-tell prompts that phrasing? His temper? The raging way he storms around? Punching holes in walls and doors? I could go on but I won’t…
Second Glance
Briana: Javi is hanging out with Briana and her girls. They play happy family and for a minute Bri can see a future – not just a ploy to get them both a storyline and more camera time.
Kailyn: Jo’s family is trying to use their ‘fame’ for some good to raise money for Puerto Rico. Which is great. Someone should. But we also get our first introduction to ‘Daddy Dom’ -I’m with Jo, I just don’t think I can get used to that.
Leah: Leah is prepping the girls for Halloween. The twins fight over a book, which leads to Ali falling and Leah freaking out and yelling at Gracie. She threatens to call her dad, and actually does while Grace has a temper tantrum. Here’s the thing, Aleeah treats Ali like an equal. She wasn’t gentle but this one was a true mistake. I get why Leah reacted that way but I think she is really hard on Aleeah and could have just said you need to be gentle and they could have de-escalated the situation rather than having a big meltdown.
Jenelle: Jenelle calls 911 to say her mom is hitting Jace. The police go to check. Jenelle is concerned and plans to take her mom back to court. I don’t want to be negative here but poor Jace just doesn’t stand a chance. He knows what to say to rile the other one up and he pits Jenelle and Barb against each other because he’s smart. But he’s the child. They are the adults who fall for this all the time.
Chelsea: Chelsea is going back to see a lawyer. Ugh, I should have been a child custody lawyer, whoever has these girls as clients must enjoy their second house and boat.
Now that You’re Really Paying Attention
Kailyn: In Kail-land they are prepping for the fundraiser. 2.5 lesbians and Jo and Vee. Baby Lux has no father on his birth certificate so they all have to chip in.
Briana: Briana continues playing happy family with Javi. She pawns of caring for her children on him. As she is getting ready for their date her sister comes in and yells at him. Then her mom questions his intentions.
Leah: Leah goes trick or treating with the girls and Jeremy. If Leah ever took time with her life to think through decisions she’d be far happier. She clearly still likes Jeremy and it’s just too bad they’ve been married and divorced already.
Chelsea: Adam is also spending time with lawyers as he is taking Chelsea back to court to reduce child support.
Jenelle: Barb, of course, has a different account of the events prompting the 911 call. Jace sounds out of control already. The whole thing makes me really stressed.
Briana: Briana and Javi go out on their date. She flirts by chewing with her mouth open.
Kailyn: Kail and Dom head back home from the fundraiser. Kail clearly likes Dom and she flirts but we aren’t certain if the relationship is confirmed to whoever texted.
TELL US – THOUGHTS ON LAST NIGHT’S TEEN MOM EPISODES?
Recap Author: Jeannie S.
Photo Credit: MTV
The post Teen Mom: Young And Pregnant Recap: Out With The Old, In With The New appeared first on Reality Tea.
Roseanne Barr is saying sorry and possibly leaving Twitter after coming under fire for what she called a "bad joke." Digital backlash arose after Twitter users caught wind of a...
It was a close one for the former Countess! After she was arrested in Palm Beach over Christmas and charged with drunkenly assaulting an officer, Luann de Lesseps was on the hook for FOUR felonies (and one totally embarrassing arrest video), but upon accepting a guilty plea her charges will convert to misdemeanors.
Initially, the Real Housewives Of New York star was charged with violently resisting arrest, disorderly intoxication, and battery on a law enforcement officer – all felonies which would carry mandatory jail time, however after pleading down Luann will likely get off with probation and a fine. How do you say “Whew!” ala Francaise?
The Daily Mail says Luann is due back in court in July, and if no additional incidents occur, her violations will be reduced to misdemeanor counts of disorderly intoxication and trespassing with additional felony counts being dropped.
Luann’s scrape with the law came after her ever-so-brief marriage to Tom D’Agostino abruptly ended in divorce following allegations that he cheated (again). The Countess has admitted their relationship was bad for her and also suggested that her irascible behavior the night of the arrest was because of tequila someone slipped something into her rose. Luann has been known to fall on her own bushes, though, so…
After her arraignment, the Countess went to rehab and claims she’s no longer drinking in order to focus on her sold-out cabaret review, Countess & Friends. Luann’s assault on an officer that drunken night happened when she resisted arrest by turning into Kim Richards locking herself in a hotel bathroom. When the officer opened the door Luann pushed him backwards and slammed the door in his face, where the door hit him in the face. Luann later threatened to kill him while she was being cuffed. I’m not sure what chapter of Class With The Countess covers the etiquette of being arrested, but perhaps a revised edition is due?
As much as I would’ve loved to see Real Housewives Of The Prison State find another castmate, and I was eager to see how Luann would style her prison garb into evening wear, it looks like we’ll have to settle for prison-inspired fashions for The Countess Collection and beautiful pewter mugshot frames! C’est la vie.
Is Luann Owning Up To Her Mistakes And Taking Accountability?
TELL US – DO YOU THINK LUANN DESERVED JAIL TIME?
[Photo Credit: Bravo]
The post Luann de Lesseps Will Not Serve Jail Time For Drunken Arrest! appeared first on Reality Tea.
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Let's face it: Watching Arrested Development now might not be as easy as it was back when it premiered 15 years ago. The canceled Fox series, which was revived by Netflix in 2013 for a...
As always, I think the Secrets Revealed episodes are better than most of what we’ve seen throughout season. And Vanderpump Rules was no exception!
Jax Taylor is totally having a pre-midlife crisis. He’s too old for a quarter-life crisis (let’s be honest, no one expects him to live to be 120 years old) and technically he’s too young for a mid-life crisis, so he’s in a 2/3 life crisis, which means having 400 birthday parties dedicated to doing things kids should do. Like the trampoline park where Tom 1 suggests they play dodgeball on teams of Jax plus all the women he’s slept with, vs. Tom and all the people Jax hasn’t slept with! Bouncing boobs of many incarnations (Jax being the biggest boob of all).
Actually, it was the season of Jax, and, it was totally too much Jax (his shenanigans have overstayed their welcome), but here we go again! At least for the last time.
The Jasification of Jax also includes the requisite 2.5 minutes of community service. Predictably Jax finds a Habitat For Humanity team led by a hot woman (probably on recommendation from Kelsey) and dragged Tom 2, also of indeterminate immaturity, along on the revamping process. Because two louses are better than one?
While limply holding hammers Jax and Tom 2 fretted that they’d chip a manicure or get a farmer’s tan before their Playa del Carmen vaycay. They were like toddlers playing with a Fisher Price toolkit. Eventually, they just sat down on the sad little frame they poorly constructed, a great simile for their actual lives, to ponder how they’d each f–ked up so much – both metaphorically and actually.
Tom 2 tried to delve into Jaxson’s inner life, to reach the root of why he cheated on Brittany Cartwright – if only to have a reason to defend Jax to Katie Maloney, but the only thing deep inside of Jax is his hunger, so they went and got lunch instead. Jax has no depth unless you count the limitless depth of his depravity and love for lunch meat.
Later Jax decides the right way to fix things is by getting botox. Like if he makes his jaw look less attack-dog then everyone will see his Jason side. So he gets botox to reduce his jaw and comes away with softer edges. It’s likely the only of his self-improvements he believed matters, A) because the results are tangible and noticeable on the surface; B) because it requires no effort on his part, and C) because what Jax really seeks is to botox Brittany’s emotions and his own impulses to self-sabotage. The frozen brain bone is connected to the jaw bone, and the jaw bone which kisses some girl not your girlfriend is connected to the heart bone, and the heart bone is connected to the boner…
Also, I think Brittany was over-compensating with all those birthday festivities. Like, Look Jax – Love me! I’ll make you tater tots and tramboobilybop parties and take you to tequila heaven. Give it a rest, girl! She definitely has some weird mommy fetish. No wonder Lala Kent says Brittany is her type. Lala, who loves bottles so much she keeps a water bottle by her bed to masturbate with and um, douche her vag with while watching lesbian porn? I do not understand this at all, but like Ariana Madix points out, it does not seem healthy.
Most of the things coming out of Lala do not seem healthy. Like her idea that surgically altering her body and then showing it off equals high self-esteem. To know Lala’s body part obsessions intimately is to love her? Actually, if you know about Lala’s body or Lala’s man, you pretty much know all there is to know about Lala. She’s a she-child reduced to the sum of her useful woman parts; a nesting doll of vag, tits, smile, ass, and um, BJ lips? The smallest doll, the one that doesn’t open and has nothing inside, is Lala’s brain. Which just has FEMINIST scrawled on it in hot pink Comic Sans font. Lala probably thinks Comic Sans is rap group from the 90’s, just like she thinks feminist is an advertisement for Mi-Rand’s plastic surgeon friend.
Lala also tells us that (presumably pre-boob job) her boobs were different sizes so she had a heart tattooed around the smaller boob’s nipple. How sweet. /Sarcasm
James Kennedy, who was in all his glory last night, accurately assessed why his relationship with Lala ultimately flopped – he was the “broke busboy” and Lala ditched him for Mi-Rand‘s PJ. I believe it goes deeper than that – like Lala has goals, professionally and personally, and she recognized that James is the eager puppy who would pee on the floor too many times until the owner put a ‘free to a good home’ advertisement on Craigslist. Only Lisa Vanderpump has the patience for all that pissing about. And Lala, despite her love of physical alterations, is on borrowed time with her hot body and better use it to further her position while she can. No shade here, just my assessment.
James obviously still has unresolved issues over Lala and longs for the days when they were making out like the teenagers they practically were while flying commercial. These were sweeter simpler times and I bet Lala yearns for them too, in her way, but commercial air doesn’t appreciate Lala’s Mile High Club sensibilities, so … you know! Lisa does James the good service of warning him to lay-off Lala’s man and James knows this, but can’t stop himself. Just like Lala can’t stop eating Raquel Leviss‘s pasta! Maybe the “pasta” is actually James?!
The best James moment, though, was when he found Jax’s phone on the floor of SUR and asked Stassi Schroeder if she still knew the password so they could see if there was any dirt. Stassi knows what lurks beneath and even her mind isn’t dark enough to deep dive there, so she pretends Jax is smart enough to change it. Lala got all self-righteous on Brittany’s behalf, so James fondly recalled the days when Lala had cajones and wasn’t trying to suck up to the likes of Stassi’s Shemotional Terrorist Cabal. Lala complained that James is always trying to come for HER pasta, which turned into another argument about Raquel’s pasta. Is pasta a euphemism for pussy? patriarchy? patchouli? Or does Raquel just really like carbs? Why is the most interesting thing about Raquel the pasta we’ve never seen her, or anyone else, eat?!
Round 2 of the pasta argument ended in the same saucy mess of James not being able to apologize for comparing Rand to a fried goat cheese ball.
Here’s the thing, I do enjoy Lala, but I wish she would stop bragging about how to have body confidence and all the people who pay her bills, even though I’m jealous and slightly in awe that she can find people willing to FIGHT over paying her bills. Also, let’s be honest Lala’s obsession with “Rand” is no different than Scheana Marie‘s obsession with Rob. (Except that Rand might actually like Lala.)
There were so many cringe-worthy ScheRob scenes last night! YAY for me! Also, Shay made an appearance! He was glowing with happiness like a photoshopped bride in her life-sized wedding photos. Speaking of, Andy enquired about where they all went after the divorce and Scheana revealed that a fan bought one – probably for target practice or some other prank – while another went to the Museum of Broken Relationships in LA. That is a real thing – there’s also one in Bratislava Croatia which my mom recently visited – only to pay her respects to Scheana’s triflingly short delusional marriage. And yes, Jax does need an entire exhibit. Let’s just dedicate next year’s MET Gala theme to that, actually. The Jaxification Of Fumin’ Hearts and everyone can dress up like Stassi after 5 hours of day drinking in the California sun. Actually, let’s just make that the theme of Stassi’s next birthday party – she appreciates the macabre and the murdering of virtue and innocence!
Anyway, back to Scheana and Rob. She was the original Toca Madera girl, except it wasn’t Toca Madera, and Rob was the hostess, not some random. Hilariously Scheana initially rejected Rob – he’s probably been plotting his revenge all these years and then finally seized upon the opportunity to dump her on TV after mortifying her. Too bad he presumed Scheana has the capacity for humility.
As Scheana told us, she and Rob, they had a lot of firsts… some very graphic firsts. /BARF Somehow James and Raquel ended up out to dinner with Rob and Scheana where he told the story of how he used to date the daughter of the Sultan of Brunei. Or at least that’s what her instagram bio said. While Raquel ponders the difference between risotto and ravioli, James ponders how the mighty have fallen right into Scheana’s life-sized usie collection. I wonder if there’s a portrait of Scheana and Shay being used for dart practice in the princess wing of one of the sultan’s palaces?
The other thing that happened was that Tom 1 tried to convince us that Zoolander was based on his real-life success as a male supermodel. In addition to Blue Steel and Le Tigre he also coined the poses Man With Peach Pit In Manties, Ice Ice Loser, Hungover Morning, Sun In My Mascara’d Eyes, and Hipster With Coffee Roasting Concern. All of that perfection was loaned out, charitably, for a St. Louis Magazine no one has heard of. Assisted by Tom 2 who is an expert on Man With No Peach Pit In Pants. Fly little protégé, fly!
Speaking of protegé’s Stassi and Patrick’s relationship has devolved into him being her vernacular coach. It’s so her podcast can become even more galvanizing! Does he mean ostracizing? Which is his current lesson plan, because they’re only communicating through email. Basically, Patrick sends Stassi a list of inflammatory and angry but big, fancy diction words and asks her to define them, then use them in a self-deprecating sentence. Brittany notes that those who can’t do relationships are often the first to give advice. Ergo those in glass spray tanning booths shouldn’t throw tantrums. Or stones. Or baby bottles. Because Lisa is only interested in cleaning up James’s mess following a promise she made to his disastrous parents that she will always take care of him. James mistily admits that coming to SUR is like coming home. Which is both sad and endearing. But this is why I love James – unlike Jax there is actual softness and sweetness deep inside.
Also, I love a girl’s night too. Really it is better than anything, but I think Lala should stop trying to reinvent it into lesbian orgy porn for the MiRand’s gaze!
Photos – Raquel Graduates From College!
TELL US – WHAT WAS YOUR FAVORITE SECRET REVEALED? HAS JAX TRULY CHANGED?
[Photo Credits: Bravo]
The post Vanderpump Rules Secrets Revealed Recap: Botoxed Emotions appeared first on Reality Tea.
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Happy Tuesday! Let’s take a peek at what the reality stars have been up to in our new photo roundup. The Real Housewives of New York City star Carole Radziwill looked like she was having the time of her life at the 2018 American Ballet Theatre Spring Gala. Her co-star Bethenny Frankel was also in good spirits as she attended the 70th Annual Parsons Benefit.
Scheana Marie and her Vanderpump Rules sidekick Billie Lee hung out together at a Victoria’s Secret event in L.A. Scheana was also hanging in Vegas.
Kris Jenner was spotted with her boyfriend Corey Gamble at the Monaco Formula One Grand Prix. Check out these and more hot pics in the gallery below!
What do you think of Carole Radziwill’s blue dress? What about Bethenny’s look?
Photo Credit: Roy Rochlin/Getty Images
The post Photos: Carole Radziwill, Bethenny Frankel, James Kennedy, Scheana Marie and More Reality Star Sightings appeared first on Reality Tea.
The broadcast networks have (mostly) signed off from their fall seasons. Memorial Day is over. Summer is officially here. And while the hottest months of the year used to mean TV just...
