Gotta be honest here, we were expecting more from an American Horror Story episode airing on Halloween. Specifically, we were thinking there would be a little more horror, like those...
We no longer have to hate Miguel! At least according to Mandy Moore, Sterling K. Brown, and Susan Kelechi Watson, we don't have to hate Miguel, all because we now know that Rebecca...
Bloop! NeNe Leakes is back on the Real Housewives of Atlanta scene, and she's not wasting any time on the drama front. Did you expect anything less? In this sneak peek of the season...
Team Flash has got a new member! Barry (Grant Gustin) and co. officially welcomed Ralph Dibny (Hartley Sawyer), AKA the Elongated Man (though that's not yet his name) to the team...
This Is Us had to make a change to its Halloween episode tonight. In the version of the hour given to press, a 20-something Kevin's roommate comes home and tells him that he has been...
Before we get into the hot gossip of the day, here’s the summary of tonight’s new episode of Below Deck! “Captain Lee, Kate, Nico and Matt have their hands full when eight big personalities from Texas come on board. Matt attempts to step up his cooking game, even though the alcohol fueled guests may not notice. Bruno decides to help the interior, only to discover how unorganized they are. Nico attempts to show Captain Lee he is better bosun material than EJ, but a beach picnic might prove too much for him to handle. Meanwhile, Kate attempts to protect Jen from some very hands-y guests.”
Join us in the comments to snark our way through the episode at 9/8 C!
Hot Tea for October 31st!
The new Jersey Shore spinoff is called Floribama Shore – Dlisted
Kim Kardashian had a theme going this Halloween – Celebitchy
Kyle Richards bought a new mansion – Page Six
Andy Cohen addresses his comment about Kathy Griffin – Us Magazine
Shep Rose jumps to Andy Cohen’s defense – Tamara Tattles
Before the 90 Days couple split? – Starcasm
Didn’t Reese Witherspoon’s embarrassing faux pas teach them anything? – Dlisted
8 PM EST –
The Voice (NBC)
9 PM EST –
Below Deck (Bravo)
The Little Couple (TLC)
10 PM EST –
Leah Remini: Scientology (A&E)
Broken Skull Challenge (CMT)
Chopped (Food Network)
The Challenge (MTV)
Chrisley Knows Best (USA)
11 PM EST –
WWHL (Bravo) – Whoopi Goldberg and Julianne Moore
Photo Credit: Bravo
The post Halloween Gossip Links & Below Deck Virtual Viewing Party – October 31st appeared first on Reality Tea.
How did Bethenny Frankel have time and energy to appear on Watch What Happens Live? She’s so busy running her empire, raising her daughter, saving the world, and everything else she has going on. To make matters worse, her beloved dog Cookie just passed away and she still managed to make it to the clubhouse to talk with Andy Cohen.
Bethenny really can do it all: in good times and in bad she is really killing it.
Andy announced, “This is a really sad day. In all honesty, your dog Cookie who we’ve all gotten to know and love- your dog of seventeen years- passed away today. You honored your commitment and are here. I don’t know how. I really appreciate it.”
Bethenny told the host, “You’ve been so sweet. You love your dog Wacha so much. She had a beautiful life. It was a little bit of a torturous ending because I was with my daughter and she had a very, very, long, long seizure and it was brutal. You don’t think about the little things like the vet being forty five minutes away and I had my seven year old. It was not pleasant, but you know what, she lived a really long and amazing life.” She also took the time to thank her fans for their support on social media, saying, “You all have been so unbelievable. Thank you so much.”
Then the conversation shifted to Bethenny’s hurricane relief efforts. He told her, “I am so proud of you. We are all so proud of you for the work you have done for the hurricane victims.” He added, “The value of Bethenny’s totaled efforts is four million dollars and growing.” Bethenny corrected him, “It’s over like ten million dollars now.” Wow. She also shared, “You’ve been very generous, too, though. I want you to know that Andy, long before it was cool to be charitable, fell in and I appreciate it. Thank you.”
Andy said what we were all thinking, “I’m impressed. If anyone can get it done, it’s this one.”
A caller wanted to know if any Housewives donated. Bethenny revealed, “Tinsley [Mortimer] was the first one and she came in very, very big. Ramona [Singer] donated twice. Dorinda [Medley] was in a cooking competition and donated the proceeds.” Outside of the New York City ladies, Bethenny shared, “Lisa Rinna made a nice donation.”
And just when it seemed to be the most harmonious Watch What Happens Live episode of all time, Andy had to ask Bethenny, “What was your reaction to Luann [de Lesseps] and Tom’s [D’Agostino] divorce?” She didn’t hesitate to say, “Well you had the most sappy, ridiculous, seer sucker, Sag Harbor special. You were like ‘shock waves sent through the nation’ and I’m like ‘did you mean obvious waves?’ I love you, Luann, like an ex frienemy, but it wasn’t shock waves.” Andy couldn’t even argue with that and laughed uncontrollably as Bethenny said it.
TELL US- WHAT ARE YOUR THOUGHTS ON BETHENNY’S HURRICANE RELIEF EFFORTS?
[Photo Credit: Charles Sykes/Bravo]
The post Bethenny Frankel Opens Up About Cookie’s Death, Luann de Lesseps’ Divorce, & Which Housewives Donated To Hurricane Relief appeared first on Reality Tea.
Vanderpump Rules is back and the drama is amazing. All the characters are returning – yes, even Lala Kent (which we knew, since she’s been spotted filming with the cast about a dozen times), and the relationships are all a-frazzled! The new Vanderpump Rules season premieres on December 4th.
“Usually with this group where there’s smoke, there’s fire,” warns Stassi Schroeder as we get a clip of Lala announcing that someone’s man made out with her friend. Oh, the cheating scandals of Vanderpump Rules are also back!
Tom 2 and Katie Maloney were finally getting along (89%), but once again it appears some drunken drama has torn them apart. Shockingly Tom 1 and Ariana Madix could also be headed for a split as their relationship is dragged down by fights over different priorities. Thankfully the Toms are still madly in love!
Speaking of bromance, James Kennedy and Jax Taylor are finally getting along, but Jax and Brittany Cartwright – not so much! And in a shocking reversal of fortunes Lala seems to be getting along with EVERYONE! “It’s crazy how much can happen in a year, huh?!” smirks a newly accepted James.
Unfortunately not everyone is in a happy place within the group! Scheana Marie has found a new love and is once again broken up with the Three-Headed SheBeast of WeHo. Basically the anger is out of control this season as Jax, Ariana, Brittany, the Toms, and even Lisa are seen flying into a rage and someone (Kristen?!) throws a drink in James’s face.
And in other exciting news The Infamous Patrick finally makes an appearance this season – only to publicly trounce on Stassi’s heart. (Karma). The cast goes to Mexico for a trip and it looks like Lisa Vanderpump is hard at work opening a new bar … and Stassi may be working there?!
Can I just say I am SO glad not to have to watch any wedding crap this season!
You can check out the trailer here.
C’mon – you know you cannot wait! I can’t!
TELL US – ARE YOU EXCITED FOR THE NEW SEASON?
Photo Credit: Tommy Garcia/Paul Drinkwater/Bravo
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The season two finale of The Real Housewives of Dallas is upon us. The ladies have appeared to come full circle, resulting three versus three, with little hope of resolution. Cary Deuber successfully played her way into the “middle” all season, and now has a tight alliance Brandi Redmond and Stephanie Hollman. Brandi turned on LeeAnne Locken real quick and the war rages on – onto the third season, we hope. If you haven’t already, tell your friends to watch this show. They’ve earned another season. On with the show:
LeeAnne and D’Andra Simmons are engagement party planning. There is a theme and a surprise! I’m friends with LeeAnne its carnival-themed! It’s going to be more Cirque du Soleil than county fair. Keeping it classy people! Expect an eatable cotton candy wall and a “lounge pocket”, whatever that is. D’Andra is all too excited to plan a follow-up engagement brunch for the day after. Even Mama Dee Simmons approves of LeeAnne and Rich, but she’s got a date the night of the party, so don’t expect to see her. Speaking of moms, we find out that LeeAnne’s mama is coming. We’re told she and LeeAnne are estranged and LeeAnne is hoping for a resolution.
The renovation at the future Hollman mansion is underway. (We’re still not sure if Stephanie actually plans to move in, or just flip it) It sounds like she’s moving in when they talk about updating the elevator, a garage apartment, family room, playroom and a master bedroom. Oh, and expect a lot of wine in the kitchen. The living room pool is officially drained. Travis thinks the house screams Vegas. Is that a good thing? Anyway, they plan to add another $1.5 mill into updates and add-ons. Why did they buy this house again?
Over at LeeAnne’s, she and Rich await the visit of her mother. Rich is dreading it more than LeeAnne. There’s a lot of build up – LeeAnne and her mom haven’t peacefully communicated in 20+ years. Margaret rings the bell and plans to stay over. We only see her hug Rich. We’re told she was a little rough in the past but has mellowed out. Sharing hugs and smiles, Margaret doesn’t seem so scary.
Over in Brandi’s world, her daughter Brinkley thinks little people are spying on her for Santa. Adorably, she wants the Elf on the Shelf to attend her birthday party. Confetti fills the air. Bryan enters for what seems like the first time all season. Brandi tells her husband that her pregnancy test was negative and that her fertility was on the decline. This storyline continues to follow suit in other “housewives trying for a baby” fashion – the two joke about how they need to have lots of sex. But not nearly as much as Cary and Mark do…
LeeAnne’s running around her house with a box cutter towards her mother! (we kid, we kid). She’s unpacking some old belongings from years past. Apparently, her mom kept a lot of these belongings on display in her home. Maybe Margaret isn’t that bad? LeeAnne says she only saw her mom during the summers while working the carnival circuit. These two aren’t close. LeeAnne feels she hasn’t had an authentic conversation with her mom about her childhood abandonment. The two are peaceful, agreeing that they both want a REAL relationship that they hope to sort out in therapy. They may not be tight, but Margaret knows how her daughter can be. She tells her that she has to be prepared for different opinions to be voiced at therapy. They agree to not kill one another. Well, that’s a start.
Stephanie and Cary meet for lunch, and what/who are they going to talk about? LeeAnne, of course. Stephanie questions the health of Brandi’s relationship with the newly engaged Housewife. She says that LeeAnne’s manipulations spill over into their relationship. In her interview, Stephanie says she’s been bothered by Brandi’s nanny comments that had an “intent to hurt” and were out of character. Brandi joins Stephanie and Cary. Cary feels open to patching things up with the former Cheerleader – once again by blaming LeeAnne for twisting her thoughts. Brandi admits to being disappointed in herself for the comments she made. Without Brandi apologizing, Cary accepts her apology and takes ownership for saying that she wouldn’t be friends with ‘Stephandi’. Quick to blame LeeAnne (again), Cary says that LeeAnne said their behavior affects their charity world. Flashback: LeeAnne says it ruins “our reputation”. Cary feels tricked by LeeAnne into agreeing that she couldn’t be friends with the duo. Not missing an opportunity to blame LeeAnne for global warming, North Korea, obesity Stephanie says LeeAnne makes her feel like she has to choose between her and the people she doesn’t like – like Cary. Brandi finds her voice, saying that she had to be honest, LeeAnne really didn’t want her to be friends with Steph, even going as far as saying that Stephanie really wasn’t her friend AND that Cary couldn’t give two shi*s about her. All this results in Brandi questioning if LeeAnne was only using her.
Over at the new Ultimate Living offices, D’Andra is getting up her nerve to meet with the big Boss, her mother. She show’s Dee her product and it’s met with approval. Dee asks about the schedule to roll out the new miracle cream and D’Andra describes the “little snafu” halting production. Dee shouts, “the name of the PRODUCT you’re missing?!?” D’Andra has to face the music on this one, telling her mom that they’ll have to wait 4 weeks but says there are no excuses, and takes full responsibility. Touched by this, Dee starts to break down and explains that she’s of a certain age, exhausted and ready to hand over the keys to the company. In classic Dee formation, she has her finger pointed at her daughter telling her, “In my heart, I believe you will be successful, much more successful than Dee Simmons ever was with this company”. Both embrace and share in a nice, long-awaited moment.
Over at Cary’s house, the young mom and her daughter Zuri bond over her being home more. Not far behind the cameras, Mark Deuber looms. Cary tells us that her daughter is a mini-Mark. That sounds exhausting. But it all must pay off. Zuri and Mark present her with a wallet and Birkin bag, totally $20k. (Perhaps another one to put in her closet next to her skeletons?)
Therapy is in session with a leather-clad LeeAnne Locken and her mom Margaret. The Therapist is quick to point out that they have 0.00 connection through their body language. Margaret claims to be afraid that she’ll get crushed and is terrified to talk to her daughter. Ouch. LeeAnne references the “bathroom moments” she had with her mom as a child. This is when she would beg her mom in her grandparents’ bathroom not to leave her behind. LeeAnne thought her mom figured she’d just get over it. It was actually quite the opposite, with Margaret admitting of crying in the car afterward. She said she was 19, unemployed and didn’t know what to do with a young child. All this resulted in LeeAnne feeling unwanted. Her mom assures her that she didn’t dump her daughter and that she loved her and apologizes. Now it’s time for this mother/daughter duo to hug it out. There seems to be a lot more work here, but hopefully, these two can reach some semblance of a relationship.
It’s time for LeeAnne and Rich’s engagement party, complete with Real Housewives of Beverly Hills music. (Does that mean it’s supposed to EXTRA fancy?) The ladies are drinking gold flakes, and cotton candy is being dissolved in champagne (with real glass champagne flutes). Class. Stephanie enters and shares an awkward exchange with Rich. Kameron Westcott enters and is BLOWN AWAY. Sparkle Dog is officially out and it’s a dream come true in Kameron’s little bubble. Good for her! Dr. True enters and then the real plastic surgeon Mark and Cary come through. Cary makes it very clear that they are ONLY there out of respect for Rich. She questions the amount of times LeeAnne has threatened to kill her fiancé must be in the double digits. Later, D’Andra and Fashionista Heidi Dillon stand on the stage to congratulate the engaged couple. LeeAnne couldn’t be happier.
Brandi, who entered the party feeling conflicted approaches LeeAnne who gushes over her being the most forgiving friend and glad they’re moving forward. LeeAnne jokingly warns her not to F with her or she’ll slit her throat. Brandi can take a joke but does feel that part of it was a threat. LeeAnne tells Brandi that she gave her her heart and it’s not something she gives away lightly. If only she knew Brandi is ready to drop her like a bad habit in 3, 2, 1…
The following day is devoted to LeeAnne’s engagement brunch at D’Andra’s house. LeeAnne arrives first with many expectations – A pre-Bachelorette, before Bachelorette Party, going to the Bachelorette party, Bachelorette party, post-Bachelorette Party. D’Andra better sort out this L22 business because she’s about to be BOOKED. LeeAnne remarks that Cary and Mark were standoffish at the party the night before. Rightfully so, they may be JUST hands, but she had a lot to say about Mark.
At the Hollman house, Stephanie and Brandi chat before taking off for the brunch. Brandi tells her that she and LeeAnne had a moment where LeeAnne said she loves her but if she crosses her, she’ll slit her throat. Cut to: Stephanie’s jaw on the floor. The irony is not lost on us with the giant “PEACE” sign hanging in the background. Steph, of course, is not OK with this and finds it to be controlling. Brandi concludes that she needs space from LeeAnne.
The engagement brunch begins, which only consists of the Real Housewives. Not even Heidi or Tiffany could score a seat at this one. Cary lets us know that she is taking the high road by attending. (Good for you) They all toast LeeAnne which seems disingenuous seeing that half the table wants nothing to do with her. D’Andra asks Cary if she’ll get along with LeeAnne during the wedding planning process and is met with a, “I hope so”. LeeAnne takes this opportunity to mention that she and Rich noticed Mark was uncomfortable the night before. She also includes that Rich was upset for two days over the penis size rumors. Cary apologizes but one-ups her, telling LeeAnne that she had to hear untrue rumors for 2 YEARS. LeeAnne admits to feeling dismissed by the RN, and credits all her blow-ups as a result of Cary’s hurtful comments. Stephanie supports Cary, saying that it’s not fun being ridiculed. LeeAnne and Stephanie agree that they have no trust between the two of them.
Cary spends a lot of time talking about LeeAnne, but the Charity Queen makes it clear that she doesn’t spend time thinking about Cary when they’re not around one another. This triggers Brandi to call BS, telling LeeAnne that she lies. For example, she said LeeAnne didn’t want her to make up with Stephanie. LeeAnne denies this. Brandi also brings up the “reputation” comment LeeAnne made at the yacht in Mexico which is also denied. Flashback: LeeAnne says Brandi and Stephanie’s behavior hurts their reputation. Cary was right here. While Kameron stands up for LeeAnne, she judges Brandi behavior once again. Brandi accuses LeeAnne of stepping in during weak moments, only to use it against them later. LeeAnne again rejects the notion that she told Brandi not to be friends with Stephanie. As God as her witness, Brandi says she DID. LeeAnne claims to swear on her grandmother’s bible that she DIDN’T. Brandi has fully turned on LeeAnne, calling her a liar, saying LeeAnne has threatened to kill Cary, Marie (from last season) and now threatened to slit her throat. She tells the bride-to-be to F off, but good luck with her wedding and exits.
Stephanie and Brandi take off and D’Andra follows. Inside, Kameron questions if Cary knows LeeAnne isn’t going to REALLY kill her. Yay for Kameron who finally gets the concept of sarcasm/figure of speech/general humor. She maintains that LeeAnne doesn’t lie. Cary walks out and joins D’Andra who’s talking with the other two. D’Andra asks them if they write things down to make sure they’re correct in their counterattack points. Cary says she wouldn’t do that with friends. This proves once again that Real Housewives is like a sport – you have to come prepared with evidence, notes, direct quotes, and receipts. The cast is divided, with the trio taking off in an SUV and LeeAnne left at the table in the tears.
As far as the end of season updates go: Dee is still at the office through the launch of L22. D’Andra must wait another day to get the keys to the kingdom. Cary is back at work 2 days a week. Kameron’s dog food sales are in the pink (??), Stephanie and Travis are still renovating. Brandi and Bryan are trying for a baby and LeeAnne is starting behavioral therapy. Don’t forget to return for the two part reunion!
TELL US – THOUGHTS ON THIS WEEK’S EPISODE? WAS BRANDI WRONG TO TURN ON LEEANNE?
For even more Real Housewives and Reality TV Talk, listen to Grants Rants Hollywood Talk Podcast on Apple Podcasts and all major podcasting platforms.
Photo Credit: Bravo TV
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Noah Schnapp--who knew? Apparently the folks behind Stranger Things new the 13-year-old actor had the chops to pull off the emotional arc in season two. "When we hired him, we knew he...
House of Cards is on hold. In a statement, Netflix and producer Media Rights Capital announced that production on the sixth and final season of the series starring Kevin Spacey and Robin Wright...It may be the spookiest day of the year, but the news couldn’t be any sweeter for Camille Grammer! The Real Housewives Of Beverly Hills star is engaged to David C. Meyer, an LA lawyer who has been courting Camille for a year. Camille shared the happy news via Twitter this week when she posted the above pic with a cryptic message, “Party night with my love. We have a secret.. guess.”
The news was confirmed via various media sources shortly afterward, and by Camille herself – who’s been thanking followers and fans for their outpouring of support and congratulations.
As many RHOBH viewers remember, Camille started the franchise on a prickly note, but viewer reaction changed dramatically when news of her then-husband, Kelsey Grammer’s very public affair broke.
Camille and Kelsey ultimately divorced in 2011, and continue to share custody of their two children. However, they reportedly share very little communication with one another to this day.
After her divorce, Camille battled cancer, which she is currently in remission from. She also made abuse allegations against her former boyfriend, Dimitri Charalambopoulos, who she accused of assaulting her when she was recovering from cancer treatments.
Dimitri then sued Camille for defamation of character, but two years later, Camille’s counter-suit against that scumbag Dimitri awarded her $121,000 and dismissal of over half of Dimitri’s claims.
RELATED: Kyle Richards Throws A Disco Party To Celebrate Wrap Of ‘American Woman’ Sitcom
With that mess behind her, Camille has since focused much of her energy on raising awareness and funds for cancer treatment. Last year, she promoted a sneaker campaign to raise money for The Foundation For Women’s Cancer.
Now healthy and happy, Camille has been dating David, who lives in Malibu, for the past year. A source told PEOPLE that the couple is very much in love and that “There’s a casualness and easiness to their relationship. They’re a really happy, kind couple. He really loves her for her.”
Aww. Congrats to the happy couple! I’m rooting for these two. And I hope we get to see glimpses of David in Camille’s appearances on RHOBH this season!
TELL US: WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THE ENGAGEMENT NEWS? ARE YOU HAPPY FOR CAMILLE?
Photo Credit: Twitter
The post RHOBH’s Camille Grammer Is Getting Married Again! Announces Engagement To David C. Meyer On Twitter appeared first on Reality Tea.
Last night’s Real Housewives Of Orange County episode was the equivalent of drunk sorority girls. Leave Iceland alone! Like seriously – go home ladies; you’re drunk! Especially Vicki Gunvalson. First she was dying, then she was drunk, then she was sobbing into Tamra Judge‘s hair… It’s the casserole that revived her! That and the attention frenzy in the wake of her ‘heart attack.’
Poor Vicki her love tank’s connected to her heart valve, her heart valve’s connected to that part of her brain that says ‘PAY ATTENTION TO ME! ME! ME! ME!” So she was vomiting and having heart palpitations while Peggy Sulahian and Kelly Dodd fought over who was better at caring for Vicki’s sputtering love tank.
This was probably actually the pinnacle of Vicki’s existence; her tank was filleth over with good tidings (which taste remarkably like tater tots drenched in cheese). It was a revolving door of concerned Housewives, all fighting over the position of HEAD NURSE in the asylum. Kelly, that lucky minx, got to be Nurse Ratchet. I mean Kelly’s sleeves alone where just the perfect illustration of what a carnival sideshow Vicki’s ‘ailment’ was. She’s under “cardiac care,” y’all – whatever that means – for an enlarged delusion valve.
Suddenly a cute doctor appeared on the scene like this is a soap opera. We didn’t get to hear him deliver his line that Vicki has 2 hours left to live because Peggy kept interrupting to demand he “care for Vicki.” Maybe Peggy doesn’t know the meaning of the word “doctor” in English?
Peggy was so emotional about Vicki’s health [journey], because it brought back memories of her dad dying of a stroke (um…), and also she feels lucky to have Diko take care of her during her cancer and wants to pay that care forward – or something. I don’t really understand how Vicki’s melodramatic antic gives Peggy hospital-based PTSD, but this is Bravo, so nothing makes sense. Especially not Peggy.
Also hasn’t Peggy known Vicki like 10 minutes? Why was she answering on Vicki’s behalf and yelling in the doctor’s ear? I don’t believe Vicki signed a waiver giving Peggy permission to make medical decisions on her behalf. Obviously Meghan Edmonds, medical expert since she used to be a pharmaceutical sales rep, kept wandering in and out, to ‘check in.’ Then Tamra strutted in wearing a a mummy costume, and asserted herself the true boss. She gently sat next to Vicki on the bed, took her hand and softly asked what happened. Finally Kelly barged back in to DEMAND everyone get out because Vicki needed open heart surgery right there in the Zimbabwe Suite, which would require an antler be used as a scalpel.
With surgery prepped, Shannon Beador gathered all of her wits to take control. Surgery isn’t needed – an organic colonic is! After all, Shannon knows a thing or two about broken hearts! And Shannon knows that the fastest way to kill a woman is improper Feng shui in the operating theater. (They call it a “theater” in England, and I thought the word was appropriately appropriated here, given the circumstances).
It all got so out of hand Fridrik, the hotel owner (and Vicki’s future Icelandic emotional affair and soul mate (aka a badass, non-broke Brooks to Steve’s careful, patient, understanding, Donn-ness)), emerged to demand the coven back off, because Vicki was being taken to the hospital. Diagnoses … heart burn? Attention displacia? Immediately Dr. Meghanny Drew and Dr. Moon InShanity Beador asked why a portable EKG wasn’t on the scene. Cause: DUH – that is not dramatic enough! This is not your first rodeo, girls! Y’all need to take a page from La Gunvalson’s playbook, chapter Diva Le Realite on how to exaggerate routine exhaustion and dehydration into a full episode, ending with all your frienemies pouring you drinks. C’mon now!
Even better, Vicki emerged from her room on a gurney with Yolanda Foster’s bathrobe turned INSIDE OUT and draped over her head protectively. Vicki bringing new life to the term ‘ghosting’! Naturally everyone but Peggy laughed. After that they all realized she was fine, but not Peggy. She argued with Kelly, then chased the ambulance into the parking lot before hiding in her room to call Diko for permission to go to the hospital.
All that drama and ambulance chasing made the other women hungry, so they sat down to a delicious dinner of soup, fish, and cocktails while discussing how Vicki is the queen of over-reacting. And this performance surely warrants a casserole as a reward! Kelly, Shannon, Tamra, and Meghan cared for Vicki in truly the most-perfect way possible: they made a toast to her and then the concocted the perfect casserole from the hotel kitchen. Obviously Icelanders revere the spirit of the OG.
Lydia was the only one who went to the hospital. Carrying her bible, of course. From her place at the dining table, Kelly decided they would take shifts – after she ate (and drank) she would taxi to the hospital to relieve Lydia. Since Vicki was obviously at death’s door, Tamra would take the next shift. All Kelly talked about was these SHIFTS! SHIFTS! SHIFTS! Attention K-Mart employees there’s a Blue like special on Aisle 4 (who knows what movie that line comes from?!) Then Peggy had to screw errrrbody’s shifts up! Apparently no one got the memo that Diko manages this crew and he appointed Peggy shift supervisor.
After getting Diko’s consent, Peggy barged into the restaurant to arrogantly inform Kelly that she was officially fired as No 1 Vicki Friend. Peggy was leaving for the hospital STAT – come hell or full cocktails to see Vicki in her last moments, and that she had no time to waste! Kelly, though, is a girl with her priorities in tact; she just wanted to finish her drink which would take about “2 seconds!” then get in the taxi together. Unfortunately Manager Diko told Peggy to GO immediately and when he tells her to do something, she does it – cause that’s how respectful marriages work in liberal wealthy suburbs. Down by the beaches of bedlam where Kelly lives, marriages fail because the women have opinions. After a brief argument, Peggy decides to leave without Kelly and even tells the driver to leave without her! She who saveth Vicki firstest reaps thou reward in the after-trippth lifes!
By the time Peggy arrives Vicki has been told to go home to rest. She has to give herself a shot though! A shot of tequila, apparently. Lydia has that look that mothers get when children pretend their bumped knee requires amputation and a 2 hour tantrum. She was done with this shit. Especially when they returned to the hotel to the other women drunk and throwing casseroles in Vicki’s [two] faces. Nobody made Saint Peggy or Saint Lydia a casserole for saving Vicki’s life, though! Lydia smartly went to bed, but Peggy hovered around to make sure Vicki didn’t keel over again. Vicki only would’ve relapsed if the other had women ignored her.
Instead Vicki was folded into the several bottles of champagne the women have waiting in Shannon’s room for a THANK JESUS YOU DIDN’T DIE celebratory party. Yes, I know: Satan is confusing!
After a zillion or so drinks, Tamra and Vicki fall all over each other in tears and drunkenly half-apologize/half-argue and sob over how Brooks broke them, and now Vicki is trying to break TEddie. Tamra and Vicki experience emotions the way Klingons do – they roar at each other, bellowing and knocking each other down, until they press slur and snarl with their foreheads pressed together meaning love. It ends when somebody pees their pants. This requires a lot of WOO HOOS and alcohol.
While Tamra and Vicki were crying about how they each loved each other too much, Shannon was sneering into Meghan’s ear that Vicki is a liar, manipulating Tamra again with the intent to destroy her. Meghan gets it, but she’s not emotionally invested enough to say it out loud. Instead she tries to shush Shannon and convince her to role with the peace, but Shannon will explode when Shannon wants to! Shannon is batshit crazy to not see how Tamra and Vicki are equals in bad to the bone-ness. Tamra is no sweet innocent My Little Lydia, Princess of Special Snowflake land. Or maybe Shannon realizes that TamIcki are stronger and more evil together? So, just when we thought all would be well, Shannon started yelling at Tamra for falling for Vicki’s lies. Luckily they were all too drunk to A) notice or B) remember.
Did I mention it was like 2 am by this time and they’d already been up all the previous night, then hiked a glacier four-wheeled over Death Valley, and had an argument over texts before Vicki returned to the hotel to dieish-die. This while trip has been spent at death’s door.
At around 4 am things really kicked up because Peggy and Kelly got into a nonsensical argument about who was more annoying. I say Peggy! Drunk Kelly rightfully called Peggy out for faking ignorance and Peggy retaliated by threatening to tattle to Diko and make him call Michael! That is literally the DUMBEST thing I have ever heard on one of these shows.
What the f–k century and country is Peggy living in!? Tamra just started laughing and laughing and laughing until she pissed her sweatpants then collapsed in a heap on the floor, catatonic. She stayed there until around 11am when she awoke, her face covered in black tar, and started knocking on doors to see who was alive for shopping! She was also still wearing her pissy pants (and probably also still drunk). Sanitation is our priority here at the Bravo HQ! #CallLisaRinna #Depends
Vicki made a miraculous recovery. Like IT’s ALIVE. Just in time for Halloween – the walking dead stumbled blindly into the light, making gaping motions with her mouth and fumbles for Tamra, whom she encloses in a alien face-eating embrace. They don’t need words to express that things are all good. They’ve made happiness again over bottles of Cristal and pee-stains.
Is there no better proof that Vicki and Tamra are soulmates than how they both basically peed on each other. It’s the weirdest friendship pact ever, but I’d rather have them pissing than being pissed!
Lydia is the only one well-rested. And now she is confused about what the hell she missed sleeping off the satan. Vicki and Tamra are friends! Kelly isn’t sure what happened, but she don’t have no regrets!
Peggy is in seclusion after Kelly called her an idiot and mocked her. The other ladies try to rouse her, but she put a “Do Not Disturb” sign on her door and is ignoring them. Even invitations to shop couldn’t pry Peggy from her hurt feelings cocoon. So they decide the best way to smooth things over is to buy Peggy a present. Matching furry donuts for their heads! After their bonding night, everyone is in high spirits except Shannon. Sure she fake laughed when they found a giant gnome statue and Vicki teased that there was a chin hair, but not by the hair of Shannon’s chinny, chin, chin will she let Vicki huff, and puff, and blow Tamra’s fortress of defense down.
Lydia notices that Shannon is acting twitchy and asks her what’s wrong, and what’s wrong – as always – is Vicki. Shannon is spitting mad that Vicki is up to her lies again. And once again, Lydia finds herself in that exhausted space. This was supposed to be a vacation from her kids, you guys!
Back at the hotel Peggy is still unresponsive. Maybe she contracted Gunvalsonitis? She’s not answering the door, the phone, or texts. When Lydia finally threatens to tell the hotel they’re worried, Peggy calls out that she needs time alone. ALL THE TIME and she won’t come out! Peggy has never been treated as horribly as she was last night when all the women laughed at Kelly’s mean comments. Therefore she will punish them with the Armenian Silence Treatment which is far worse than the American one. Armenians hold a grudge better, longer, tougher – wait how does one ‘hold a grudge?’ Is it in a bag? Can you pick it up? What’s “grudge”?
Now that they know Peggy is theoretically alive, everyone shrugs and goes back to doing what they’re doing (drinking). Especially Peggy’s good friend Vicki. Now that she has Tamra back, there’s no room for anyone else. Peggy really wanted Vicki and Tamra to be friends again, but be careful what you wish for. Peggy probably doesn’t know what that expression means though. We better call Diko for permission to explain it.
I decided I don’t care if Vicki is sincere or Tamra is, I just like seeing them have fun together. Or at least fight over something new and different for a change!
TELL US – WAS VICKI FAKING HER ILLNESS? DID PEGGY OVERREACT? SHOULD SHANNON BE WORRIED THAT TAMRA AND VICKI MADE UP?
[Photo Credits: Bravo]
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