Thursday, September 15, 2016

Don’t Be Tardy Season Premiere Recap: Attitude of Gratitude

Don't Be Tardy Season Premiere recap

Kroy Biermann and Kim Zolciak Biermann

Welcome back to the party, readers! It’s been a few months since we have had the pleasure of watching the Biermann Bunch but never fear, Don’t Be Tardy is happy to make up for lost time with PLENTY going on. Even without the show, we have had non-stop coverage of Kim Zolciak’s stint on Dancing with the Stars, her stroke, and Kroy Biermann’s football trades. But let’s not get too far ahead of ourselves and go back to a simpler time.

In Kim’s world, life is good. She’s 37, not pregnant (for now), healthy, and pouring her heart and soul into Dancing With The Stars. Then she has a stroke out of the blue and has to have major heart surgery. Kim recovers and schedules heart surgery around her DWTS schedule so she can collect that paycheck finish what she started. Oh, and the stroke has given Kim a new perspective on life and what’s important. She has an attitude of gratitude and no longer sweats the small stuff, like if her hair is perfect or if her car is clean. I would like to note here that her hair looks perfect.

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Kim Zolciak stroke

Kroy was understandably scared by the thought of losing his wife and being left with six kids to raise on his own. But he’s thankful Kim’s condition wasn’t worse and that she can sit by him for the next “eighty years”. Kroy is a loyal and loving husband but maybe math isn’t his strong suit.

One really important thing that Kim has realized she can’t take for granted is her fertility. Or more specifically, her eggs. Kim pines for another child and Kroy says maybe in ten years. There he goes trying to count again. Either way, Kim has them scheduled to meet with her OB/GYN to discuss their options.

Now that Kim has all this time to not sweat the small stuff, she can pay attention to what matters, like why Tracey has presented her with regular old American tortilla chips and not the kind she gets in Mexico. How is Kim supposed to be keep that attitude of gratitude when her nachos aren’t even authentic? Why is Tracey being such a diva when she could easily just go to Mexico and get Kim tortilla chips anytime she wants nachos? #problemsolved

Tracey can’t drop everything to deal with smuggling Mexican chips abroad because she’s busy on all kinds of dating apps. Brielle wants to be more choosey since her breakup, so sticks to Bumble (where it’s lady’s choice when it comes to seeing if you’re a match). Kim says Brielle’s breakup was hard on her but probably not too hard since she’s right back at it, swiping away and targeting local baseball players.

Don't Be Tardy Season Premiere recap

Kim and Kroy head to the doctor. Apparently the dress code is smart and caffeinated, with their matching fashion frames and travel coffee mugs. Dr. Hood wants to know why they are there since Kroy had a vasectomy and advises them to freeze her eggs ASAP. I don’t think Kim enjoyed being told that every day she wakes up, her eggs are depleting but I don’t blame her for that one.

Brielle and Ariana don’t take the news of Kim even thinking about having another child well, comparing their household to a daycare. Brielle asks Kim and Kroy how many eggs she has and they spin a tale of how there are eggs in your throat so if you do something you aren’t supposed to (use your imagination, people), you could get pregnant. Brielle is way too smart to fall for that and proclaims that all of her eggs are in her vagina. Thankfully, Tracey is there to explain to her that her eggs are actually in her ovaries and no, it’s not the same thing as your vagina.

Psychic Rose stops by for a visit and to tell the toddlers how many marriages and kids they will have. Awkward. Ariana is up next and is told she will live to be ninety, which is clearly gross to her. Brielle is going to get married this year and Kim is practically strangled by her oversized turtleneck on that one.

Don't Be Tardy Season Premiere recap

Kim gets her reading and finds out she will be around for a long time but won’t have any more kids. Although Kim puts her full faith in Rose, she calls BS on this and says that if she wants baby Kreed (the name she has already given the future boy), she will have baby Kreed. If Kim is anything, it’s demanding determined, so I wouldn’t be surprised if her will trumps Rose on this one.

TELL US – WHAT DID YOU THINK OF THE PREMIERE? WILL YOU KEEP TUNING IN THIS SEASON?

Photo Credit: Bravo

AUTHOR: KAREN

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